Wilde Stories 2010 by Steve Berman

Author:Steve Berman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: horror, gay, ghosts, homosexual, fantasy, paranormal, speculative fiction, dark fantasy, spec fic
Publisher: Lethe Press

13 May, 1640

Since van Zeeland’s death, life here has become even more dreadful, so dreadful that for near a month I could not bring myself to make any record in this log. It now seems less than likely that my words will ever be read. Still, it is my duty to chronicle these horrible events.

Of the twelve of us left, several have been dragged down into a life of unspeakable vice. Heyn in particular has become a favorite of the guards, and has begun to imbibe the vile “Milk of Paradise.” Several nights ago, I awoke to the sound of him sobbing, crying out for home. As he seemed to be overcome by shame and regret, I went to his bed to comfort him. But when I put my arm about him, his crying abruptly ceased and he grabbed me in the roughest, most obscene manner. I pushed him away, and he made no further attempt upon me, but since then my mind has been in a fury of disquiet, wondering which among us will be the next to be corrupted.

And, even worse, the purest man of our crew is among us no more. The day after van Zeeland’s death Nieuwenhuis, whose Calvinism was rigid and unbending, but whose unswerving virtue was a model for the other men, was led away in chains. Through Lieutenant Kindt’s translation, we were told he had been accused of van Zeeland’s murder, and all our protests to the contrary did not halt the proceedings. (And yet, truth be told, even had Nieuwenhuis been guilty of the crime, van Zeeland’s fate had something of the justice of divine retribution about it.) Placed in leg irons, his arms bound behind him with rough ropes, Nieuwenhuis was led away, maintaining a dignified mien to the last. Since then, near a month has passed and we have heard nothing more of his fate. Perhaps he, too, has perished in the jaws of the Beast.

From what little we can glean, the Court is in a state of disarray. There are rumors that the rebels have made steady progress, occupying new territory in Xanadu, even coming as close as the mountains surrounding the Pleasure Dome itself. Should the rebels succeed, I wonder: would they prove to be our saviors, or captors still more terrible then those in whose Decadent Grip we now are being held?

During these most awful days, my thoughts oft return to home, to the canals and fields of Holland, and to my beloved wife. And at these times the burden of my sorrows seems too much to bear. What a dark fate is mine! What an unholy place is this! With fervency and hope I daily pray to Our Lord Christ Jesus for deliverance, but my pleas are met only with silence.

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