Warrior Won by Meryl Davids

Author:Meryl Davids [Landau, Meryl Davids]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Alignment Publishing Co. via Indie Author Project

Chapter 16

L

ilah is “reading” a book at our kitchen table when I finally get the call I’ve been dreading the entire two weeks since we gave that blood.

“And then the man drinks his coffee, and then he walks out the door to go to work, and his baby waves bye,” Lilah says mimicking a reading cadence, describing what she sees in the picture.

“Is this Lorna?” the woman asks the second I answer the phone.

“It is. Madison?” My caller ID shows it’s my midwife’s office but she doesn’t sound like Sally.

“Yup.” I shift in my chair, steadying myself to absorb what’s coming. “Sally wants you to see the genetic counselor. It’s a woman named Mai Eng. She set up a tentative appointment for you and Don for Friday at five. Does that work?”

I shift again. Obviously, there is no getting steady. “You know, you have this terrible tendency to leave me hanging. I’m not going to be able to keep my blood pressure down if you don’t tell me more than that she wants me to see this woman.”

“I don’t know more than that. Honest. I got a note from Sally to call you with the referral.”

“Does she do that on purpose?” I demand, only partially kidding. “To give you plausible deniability?”

Madison chuckles, and the lighter moment downshifts my anxiety one gear. After what seems like an interminable silence, she responds. “Don’t sweat it until you hear if there is something to sweat. Actually, if I’m remembering correctly,” she adds, “you would say don’t sweat it even if you do hear that.”

She has me there. I’m the one who preaches keeping your inner peace; living in the moment; not worrying about things you can’t control; yada yada yada. Another opportunity to enter the yoga mission field.

But when I hang up the phone, I burst into tears.

“What’s wrong, Momma?” Lilah asks, setting down her book and hugging me.

I’m not sure what to say. Don and I made a commitment never to lie to our child, especially about our emotions. We each grew up in households where our mothers told us everything was fine even when it wasn’t. His mother was literally dying the last time she said this. Yet I can’t tell Lilah I’m concerned about the baby, since she’s so enamored of the idea of him.

“Momma’s not feeling well. I just got a little news that upset me.” I’m happy with this remark, and it will hold as long as she doesn’t ask me what the news is. Fortunately, she hones in on the “feeling well.”

“Momma want to lie in bed? To feel better?” Exactly what I asked her when she had a tummy ache last week.

“That’s a wonderful idea, Lilah. Want to join me?”

“Yes. I help you feel better.” As we walk up the stairs, hand in hand, I realize she already is.

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