Then She Found Me by Elinor Lipman

Author:Elinor Lipman [Lipman, Elinor]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781439186725
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Published: 2009-11-24T08:00:00+00:00

TWENTY-THREE

I called Bernice from home after school, even though I had resolved not to position myself as the apologizer. She answered the phone with a “Yes?” in the same martyred voice as her good-bye of the evening before.

“I know you’re mad at me,” I said.

She didn’t answer. I tried again. “I could tell by the way you left.”

Wearily Bernice said, “What am I supposed to say, April?‘ Yes, I’m mad; I was just beginning to feel better after a foul day when you decided you had had enough of your mother for one night’?”

“You should have called first.”

“You’ve made that eminently clear.”

“You knew he’d be there,” I said.

“So what?” she said angrily. “So fucking what? I was extremely upset and went to my daughter for solace without thinking it through to every last ramification. I’m a terrible person. I should be prosecuted for what I did!”

“You could’ve scared him off,” I said quietly. “He’s a shy person.”

“Please. I can read a situation as well as anyone. There was no danger of him leaving. If I had thought I was going to drive him away, I’d have withdrawn quickly and with due discretion. Give me some credit.”

I murmured something noncommittal.

“Did he leave?” Bernice demanded.

“No.”

“Did I ruin the evening?”

“No,” I said.

“You two seemed pretty thick, hiding out in the kitchen.”

“We were just cleaning up,” I said.

“I threw you two together, didn’t I? Unwittingly, I admit. But something was going on there … something was being forged in the kitchen while I cooled my heels in the living room.”

“Dwight was trying to help.”

“He’s not without charm. And I thought I did a fair job of drawing him out, by the way.”

I grunted.

“Are you attracted to him sexually? He’s obscenely tall.”

“Six-five.”

“I’ve never made love to a man that tall,” she said. “I’m wondering if they’re built proportionately.”

I didn’t say anything.

“I take it you know the answer?”

“Did Dwight and I go to bed after you left? No.”

Bernice said, “I think that’s probably wise.”

Because you didn’t like him, I thought. Because you wouldn’t want to sleep with Dwight.

“He certainly adores you,” she said.

“He does?”

“He never took his eyes off you. He dotes on you.”

I smiled. Bernice meant Dwight didn’t pay adequate attention to her.

“When are you going to let the poor man bed you?”

I laughed and said, “I’m sure you’ll be the first to know.”

She said, quietly but for effect, “I wish that were true.” She asked when we were going out again. If Dwight was a decent kisser. What he had to say about her.

“Nothing,” I said reflexively.

“You’re the worst liar.”

“I’m not lying. We talked about school … and some other stuff.”

Bernice hesitated and said after a few moments, “Can I give you some advice?”

Okay, I said. Depending on—

“Don’t get in the habit of defining your relationship by what I’ve said or done that day. Don’t turn Dwight into your psychiatrist. Find things to talk about besides me.”

I said, “We have lots to talk about.”

“So I didn’t ruin your romance?”

“That isn’t the issue.”

Bernice said gaily, “You’re looking for an apology for my naughty behavior? All right.

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