The Sheikh’s Forbidden Baby by Holly Rayner

Author:Holly Rayner [Rayner, Holly]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-01-20T05:00:00+00:00

Chapter 15

Elise

I don’t want to open my eyes. I’ve been awake for several minutes, aware by the lightness of the room that it’s daytime, but I don’t want to open my eyes and face it. I want to stay here in my bed in this little cottage and cling for a few moments longer to the time I’m spending with Azim. The moment I open my eyes is the moment I start to leave him again, and I can’t. I can’t face it. I’m not ready.

I can feel him beside me. I’m not sure whether he’s still sleeping or not, and a part of me wants to find out, but I know that if I followed that instinct and snuggled into him, I’d hasten the moment when we have to leave our bed. If I stay perfectly still, we can forget what day it is. We can forget the fact that it’s time to leave each other, and that by this time tomorrow, I’ll be back in America and Azim will be back in Al-Remah, with half a world between us.

That thought settles like a cold stone in the pit of my stomach, disrupting the warm contentment of being in bed with Azim.

My fiancé.

I still can’t believe he asked me to marry him. I slide my right thumb across my left hand and feel the ring again, reminding myself that it’s real. The stone is enormous, and it will no doubt take me some time to get used to wearing it. Although—can I wear it? I’m not sure. If I go home with what’s so obviously an engagement ring on my hand, people are understandably going to have questions. It might make more sense to take it off, at least for now. At least until we can go public with the news of our engagement.

If that ever actually happens, that is.

My spirits are sinking quickly now. Last night, still comfortably protected by the bubble of happiness we’d established for ourselves here in Cambridge, Azim and I celebrated our engagement and talked about the future. Now, though, I’m not sure what to think.

It seems so unlikely that we’ll ever actually get married, and while I want to believe that it will happen, there are just so many obstacles. I know Azim means it when he says he loves me, and I know I love him, too. But from where we are now, it doesn’t look like that’s going to be enough.

I roll over on my side in bed to find him awake, watching me. Almost immediately I feel like I could cry. I can’t leave him. I can’t get on a plane and fly away, not knowing when I’ll see him again.

His hand finds mine and I close my eyes and hang on. It’s all I can do, for as long as I can.

We pack in silence. I wish I had more things, more clothes, but when I came to Cambridge, it was for a weekend trip, and I’ve been washing and re-wearing the same clothes all week.

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