The Deviants by Skuse C. J

Author:Skuse, C. J. [Skuse, C. J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Young Adult, Contemporary, thriller, Mystery, Romance
ISBN: 9781474050951
Amazon: B01DT37BV0
Goodreads: 32176574
Publisher: MIRA Ink
Published: 2016-10-01T07:00:00+00:00

‘So how did the revenge on Shelby come into play?’

15

A Rather Unpleasant Meeting

‘Come on, Jess; just one more, please!’

‘Yeah, please, Jess. Tell us one of your stories.’

‘One of mine?’

‘Yeah!’

‘I don’t know. Zane got scared last time with my Black Cat story, didn’t you, Zane?’

‘I did not.’

‘You so did, Zane.’

‘I did NOT!’

‘Liar. You wet your pants.’

‘Hey, come on now, don’t fight. Choose another story, not a scary one.’

‘One about the island. Please?’

‘Yeah! About the pirates. And the jewels they kept in the walls of the cave.’

‘No, Corey, that’s silly. Jess, tell us the one with the girl who wanted to wreak a terrible revenge on her whole family so she put this stuff in the Christmas turkey that made everyone need the toilet.’

‘YEAH! Then she blocked up all the toilets so they had to poo their pants!’

‘Please, Jess, that one please!

‘Yeah, go on! “The Terrible Terrible Revenge”!’

‘Pleeeeeease?’

‘You’ve heard that one so many times, though. Ella, do you want to hear the one about the Terrible Terrible Christmas Revenge?’

‘Yes, please, Jess.’

‘OK. Are you all snuggled down comfortably? So, there was this girl who hated her family so much that she decided to wreak a terrible revenge on them. And one Christmas morning, she finally saw her chance. It would all start to happen as her family sat around the dinner table…

*

The last thing I needed that Sunday morning was lunch with the Rittmans, but I had no excuses. There was nothing I could say or do to get out of it. Max even picked me up. Door to door.

‘Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking,’ Neil began, standing up from his position at the top of the dining table (‘part of a limited edition set, carved from a now-extinct tree from the Amazon delta’). There was the usual flurry of groans and scrunched-up napkins as he scratched the end of his nose to flash his watch (‘a Breitling Transocean Chronograph with gold face, diamond numerals and unidirectional bezel, £7,000’). ‘I’d just like to say a few words to the gathered throng, if I may.’

‘Yeah, make it quick though, Neil. I wanna be back home for Christmas!’ called out Auntie Manda, who was sitting on my left in a feathery jumper that made her boobs stick out like traffic cones. Her kids were sitting alongside her. The twins were in matching pink dresses, playing some iPad game where you had to tap the screen like a maniac, the baby was in her high chair, gnawing on a soggy Yorkshire, and Shelby was texting. By the look on her face, she hated this as much as I did, though I’d noticed a few smiles in Max’s direction and a shared giggle as they brought out the condiments. He said they were laughing about Granny Ethel’s back-to-front blouse. I didn’t believe him.

‘All right, all right,’ said Neil, adjusting his Hugo Boss golfing trousers (‘£900’) over his substantial gut. He picked up his red wine glass and held it aloft. ‘I’d just like to thank my darling wife Joelle for this wonderful repast.

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