Maybe Esther by Katja Petrowskaja

Author:Katja Petrowskaja
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 2017-12-12T00:00:00+00:00

Germany itself is crumbling, becoming more and more unfathomable. The scraps of paper stick to my clothes and my computer keyboard, I’m carting this year all around, spreading the wealth, shaking this golden stockpile into the air, in the middle of Berlin, in the fall, and taking it home with me. National Socialist workers line up against Communists, the film Kuhle Wampe; or, Who Owns the World? comes to movie theaters, women protest, political terror is on the increase. The further I read, the faster the pages fall apart. I don’t want to keep on reading, I keep on reading every day. I imagine the paper falling apart altogether at the end of my reading, and the knowledge vanishing.

I read slowly, more slowly than the events unfolded, more slowly than their pressing nature would allow. The slower I am, the longer these rather unstable, yet lovely months drag on, April, May, June 1932, more and more sun, still before Hitler, before the Reichstag fire, and I don’t find anything that would lead there; even though everything is already set in motion, the world still seems whole to me. When that is no longer the case, whole will be transformed into Heil, what a greeting, and this is where I read no more.

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