How to Get Out of Your Own Way by Tyrese Gibson

Author:Tyrese Gibson [GIBSON, TYRESE]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780446585545
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Published: 2011-04-07T04:00:00+00:00

Emotional Access

I used to feel really bad about not hanging with some of my boys, the guys I grew up with. Even though we had a history, there were several times when I experienced someone saying one thing to my face and another thing behind my back, or found that people did things to put me in a state of jeopardy. I felt guilty about having more, about being the only guy in my whole crew with a car and money. Some of that was my own issue but there was some tense jealous and negative energy coming my way. But right now, at this point, it doesn’t matter if I grew up with you or not, if you’re not adding to my life, then you’re taking away from it. There is no in-between, there is no gray area. It’s not Well, you add to my life sometimes and take away from my life sometimes. No. It should always be about moving your life forward, progressing not regressing. Now, the people that I heavily associate with every day, whether on a business or personal level, add to my life.

At this point, I’m very clear about whom I give emotional access to, because when you interact with people you are giving them access to your emotions and mind-set and they can decide whether to mess up your day or not. Someone with access to you and your spirit can purposely cause you to become angry, disappointed, or uncomfortable or they can make an effort to be positive and uplifting.

There may not be an actual word to define this characteristic, but I believe there are some people that get off on trying to mess up your day. It does something for them to know that they can call you and say something or do something that will dampen your spirits. You know the kind of person I’m talking about. Your goal should be to try and get these people away from your circle as fast as possible.

Think about how your friends affect you on a daily basis. You could wake up in the best of moods and all of a sudden you get one phone call that completely messes up your day. This happens when you give wrong people access to your emotions. If you notice that there’s a pattern with a particular friend so it seems like every time they call you or send a text message it always involves drama, dysfunction, bullshit, issues, and rumors, then you must decide to slowly but surely back away from this person because they’re just consumed by negativity. Every time you answer the phone and actually sit there entertaining all their stuff, you’re telling this person who keeps calling you with all their drama that it’s okay to keep calling you—and that you’re interested in what they’re saying or support their calling you with the dysfunction. If you’re listening silently, then they’re not getting the message. But if you say to them, Please don’t

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