Fender Lizards by Lansdale Joe R

Author:Lansdale, Joe R. [Lansdale, Joe R.]
Language: eng
Format: azw3, epub
Publisher: Subterranean Press
Published: 2015-10-30T16:00:00+00:00

(23)

When we drove up in the yard, it was about four in the morning. I had work later in the afternoon, so it wasn’t so bad for me. Elbert, on the other hand, had to have the back of his head shaved and there was a big bandage taped to it.

I stopped the car. Before I got out, Elbert said, “Don’t tell your people, okay?”

“They’re going to notice you have a bandage about the size of a bed sheet on the back of your head.”

“I guess.”

“No guessing about it, Elbert. They’ll notice.”

“I’ll explain it to them. I think I’ll tell them I fell down in the van.”

“Why not just tell them the truth?” I asked.

“I’m not used to it,” he said.

“Oh,” I said. “Well, look at it this way, you were doing good there for awhile. A lot of smooth moves. I was impressed.”

“Were you?” he asked.

“Oh yeah,” I said.

“I really thought I could make that jump.”

“I bet.”

“I had never tried it backwards before, but I knew I could do it. Just knew it.”

“Maybe next time you try it you could put a mat on the other side, or have some place where there’s some soft dirt.”

“Good idea.”

“You know what surprises me most,” I said.

“What?”

“You had insurance? We don’t even have insurance. Can’t afford it. I mean, something happens to me at the Dairy Bob, Bob has insurance, but I trip out here on the lawn… If you can call it a lawn, I’m on my own.”

“When I had a job I paid up for a year,” Elbert said. “A few months from now, I’m out of insurance. We’ll be in the same club.”

“You really skate well. You want to be our coach?”

“For the derby?”

“No. The annual spelling bee. Yes, the derby.”

“Sure,” he said. “I’d like that.”

“But no backwards jumps over metal bars, okay?”

“Okay,” he said. He picked up his skates, which he had laid on the seat, and got out of the car. As we were walking he laughed out loud.

“What is it,” I said.

“Back at the emergency room,” he said. “They gave me the wrong shoes. I didn’t even notice till now. I’m wearing some other guy’s shoes.”

We both laughed then.

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