Ella & Micha 3 - The Temptation of Lila and Ethan by Jessica Sorensen
Author:Jessica Sorensen
Language: eng
Format: mobi
ISBN: 9781455574896
Publisher: Forever (Grand Central Publishing)
Published: 2014-04-30T22:00:00+00:00
Ethan
I’m wondering if I’m seriously in over my head. I realized this when she admitted to me last night while she was in the hospital waiting to get her stomach pumped that she’s been taking the pills since she was fourteen to numb her pain from something. I probably should have just told the doctors the truth and that she was an addict or even that she was suicidal, but I was afraid she’d get in trouble. Plus, she’d thrown up quite a few times by the time we got there, so there was little proof of what happened left in her. All she had to do was dazzle them with a smile and feed them a bullshit lie of mixing too much wine with a little too many pills and they let her go. Although, I wonder if they really believed her, or if the insanely busy emergency room aided her easy release.
Part of me wishes I would have spoken up. Then maybe they could have assisted her with the approaching withdrawals. When my dad came off of them things got really intense and the medication he’d been taking was dangerous to quit cold turkey so he had to come off it in low doses. My mom helped him through it, battling with him every single God damn day when he’d ask for more, and only giving him a little, slowing weaning him off them. And I start to wonder if that’s what I’m facing—if this is how it’ll be when Lila comes off the pills she’s been taking. If so, can I do it? Can I help her get better? Especially if she doesn’t want to? Part of me wants to just walk away and leave the drama behind, but the feelings I have for Lila, the ones I realized I had when I saw her on the ground like that, beg me to help her.
But I’m not a fan of drama and helping with other people’s problems, partly because it’s overwhelming and partly because I’m worried I’ll mess up, like I did with London. And Lila’s is an addiction. I’ve seen it many times. Felt it. Had it consume every single cell in my body, mind, and fucking soul. I had to get over it myself and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. And I did drugs for only a year. Lila’s been popping pills for over six years. That’s a fucking deep addiction. Plus, I know nothing about what’s even behind her addiction. What I do know is the wounds behind the addiction are even harder to heal.
After I walk out of her room, I crank up some music and sit down at my computer in the living room. Then I start researching opiate addiction and find the name of the one she told me she was taking when she was barely awake. What I find out pretty much describes what I saw with my dad. Anxiety. Irritability. Vomiting. Tremors. Confusion. The list is pretty long.
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