CHOCOLATE for a WOMAN'S BLESSINGS by KAY ALLENBAUGH

Author:KAY ALLENBAUGH
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Spiritual
Publisher: Fireside
Published: 2000-12-15T00:00:00+00:00

A CLEANSING

2000 STYLE

My son, Tyler, is six years old now and has grown beyond my protective shield. From his schoolmates, day-care buddies, and media exposure outside the home, he is learning colorful new phrases.

One day a friend of his came to play and educated my son on the fine art of insulting. From the front yard I could hear Tyler, who was playing on the backyard swings with his buddy, yell at the top of his lungs, “You couldn’t find your wiener if it was attached to a hot dog bun!” Unfortunately, our backyard is situated in a good echo zone, so it was heard around the neighborhood. I was mortified.

Soon after, I woke up to hear my young boy referring to his little sister as a “butt.” I shudder every time I hear that word because I think of the first and only time I used it. I was about my son’s age when I heard it at school. Not knowing what it meant, I immediately tried it out on my mom when I got home from school. It’s been twenty-six years and I still haven’t forgotten the mouth washing I received.

Reflecting on that memory, I finally decided that it was time to take action. I had been threatening Tyler for months. I got out of bed and called him into the bathroom. When he realized what I meant to do, he had a look of utter disbelief on his face. He struggled valiantly, and I barely managed to get a dab of liquid hand soap in his mouth. This was not the way I remembered it happening to me! I was too scared of my mom to put up a fight, and the horror of a whole bar of soap in my mouth has scarred me forever. Tyler was not only not traumatized, he barely had anything to spit out! Failed attempt, I thought to myself.

And it was. Two days later we had another occurrence of the “butt” word. I was putting him to bed.

“Good night,” I said.

“I love you,” he replied. “When it’s dark outside and all the stars are out, that’s how much I love you.”

Deeply touched by this sweetest declaration of love I’ve ever received from my son, I went into my bedroom to record this precious moment in the journal I write for him. Minutes later I overheard him talking to himself while in bed. “Kiss my butt,” he said to no one in particular. He said it again, louder, enjoying the way it rolled off his tongue, “Kiss my b-u-t-t!”

Precious moment quickly forgotten, I once again called him into the bathroom. This time he was ready. I grabbed the first thing my hand touched, a bottle of shampoo. Again, as he struggled fiercely, using every ounce of his sixty-five-pound, four-foot-three-inch frame (my son is a very big six-year-old), I managed to reach one soapy finger into his mouth. Immediately, he started gagging, spitting, crying, and yelling. Now, this was serious. I would have done my mom proud.

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