A Key to Treehouse Living by Elliot Reed

Author:Elliot Reed
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Tin House Books
Published: 2018-08-20T16:00:00+00:00

LONELY

It’s about as possible to talk about what it means to be lonely as it is to talk about what it means to be happy, sad, or content. To say, for example, that being lonely involves actually being alone would be fallacious. I can only make guesses about what I, for some reason, remember as having been a lonely moment. The lonely moment may not have been, itself, lonely. It may be the memory recalled after the fact—the consequence of reliving a memory through remembering it—that is evoking something like loneliness. It’s possible that my loneliest time was that night I slept at Ned’s, but I can’t really know. Ned wasn’t even there at the time. My uncle dropped me off at Ned’s and said Ned’s mom would be expecting me. I say I was lonely in retrospect partly because Ned wasn’t there—he was sleeping at a friend’s place—and because while I lay there in Ned’s bed, listening to the crickets, my uncle was burning down his mansion. At the time, was I lonely? I might have been content, lying there in the dark, listening to Ned’s mom and dad whispering to each other in the next room. I only knew what had really happened the next day, after the fact.

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