Who's Your Daddy? by Lynda Sandoval

Author:Lynda Sandoval
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster Children's Publishing
Published: 2004-09-10T04:00:00+00:00

ten

Fall dragged on like a particularly wicked case of PMS, leaving all three of us cranky, bloated with disappointment, and basically despising all things male. Despite our aspirations, nothing good had happened to any of us so far this year. No brilliant ideas, no progress in the dating department, no demonstrable improvement in our social lives—nada.

Big shocker of the millennium (not)—Caressa never heard anything back after she sent off that expertly forged letter to Bobby Slade. She was actually surprised by that fact, whereas the rest of us were hoping the lack of feedback would be the lightbulb inside her head to make her realize, Hey, Bobby Slade is all wrong for me, what with him being OLD and me being MAJOR JAILBAIT. Why didn’t I see it before? It didn’t work that way for Caressa at all. She was still convinced her destiny was as Mrs. Bobby Slade. Whazzup?

Though she’d promised me on the afternoon I’d forged Mr. Thibodoux’s siggy that she would quit stalking the twenty-one-year-old and start fishing in the pond of available guys our age, she had yet to cast a single line. Then again, she was pretty swamped with the dismal play rehearsals, so I decided not to issue a smackdown. It wasn’t like Meryl or I were really out there baiting hooks either.

Speaking of Meryl, the whole Ismet deal had pretty much gone down the crapper. She had gotten a lot less optimistic about her prospects with the guy after it looked like his goal in life was to pretend he was an all-American boy with a starring role on The O.C., instead of grasping hold of the reality that (1) he was and always would be Bosnian, which was (2) perfectly OKAY—duh, and (3) his family had unfortunately moved him to freakin’ White Peaks, Colorado, not Orange County, California.

NEWSFLASH: LIFE IS NOT A TV SHOW.

HELLO! Was everyone in this town perpetually stoned?

Meryl was still gaga over the guy, though, and she spent a goodly portion of her time pining away for him and their missed potential like a freakin’ war bride. She just couldn’t think of an effective way to show him she was right for him, and the rest of us had begun to think maybe she wasn’t.

I, in contrast to the delusions of Meryl and Caressa, had my feet firmly grounded in reality. Okay, so I still had a crush on Dylan, aka he-who-is-completely-wrong-for-me, but he was still dating Jennifer Hellspawn Hamilton. This was a fact I had fully and easily accepted, therefore I had not and would not act on my insane attraction. I was, instead, working off my tension by doing everything possible to make Hellspawn jealous.

It was child’s play, really.

Jennifer had nothing on me … well, except for the good looks, the popularity, the hot guy, blah blah blah. But in the wits department, I was battling with a woefully unarmed opponent, which was a beautiful thing. She despised me, but hey, that didn’t change the fact that I got to spend tons of quality time with her boyfriend while she pouted at home.

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