Ulterior Motives by Terri Blackstock

Author:Terri Blackstock
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook, book
Publisher: Zondervan
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

AFTERWORD

Recently, when I was reading the book of Zechariah, something jumped out at me that I had not understood before. It was in chapter 7, when the people came to the prophet and asked him to inquire of God whether they should continue observing the fast to commemorate the destruction of Jerusalem, since Jerusalem was now being rebuilt. God answered their question with a question. He asked them if they were fasting for him, or for themselves. And then he added something that seemed unrelated to their question. “Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the alien or the poor. In your hearts do not think evil of each other.” The people must have frowned at one another and thought, “Did God misunderstand the question? We asked about fasting on a particular day, and he answers us with all this stuff about justice, compassion, and our hearts.”

I’ve read that before and it has gone right over my head, but this time, it shone in my face like a beacon illuminating my own sins. I go to God expecting a pat on the back for all the good deeds I’ve done, all the people I’ve helped, all the enemies I’ve forgiven, all the worship I’ve sacrificed my time to offer. And God says, “Get real, Terri. Who were you doing those things for? Me or yourself?”

It’s as if I look up at God and say, “Well, if that’s not enough, what do you want?”

And he replies, “I want your heart pure. Your good deeds amount to nothing but filthy rags if your heart isn’t pure. If worshiping me is a sacrifice, and if your good deeds are nothing more than markings on the scoresheet of your life, then you still don’t get it.”

Like the chicken-and-the-egg question, I guess it all comes down to the question we Christians continually have to ask ourselves. Which came first, the righteous heart or the good works? Do good works give us a righteous heart, or does our righteous heart lead us to do good works? Which would God rather see?

I know the answer, and most of you do, as well. God doesn’t ask for a scoresheet or a legalistic report card. He’s already done all the work to save us. He sent his Son to die on the cross for all of our sins and to demonstrate our inheritance in his Resurrection. All he asks is that we give him our hearts. All of our hearts.

So many times I’ve run myself ragged trying to do things that I believe are pleasing to God, only to realize sometime later that I’ve neglected my prayer life and my Bible study—in fact, I’ve left God out of it entirely. “Was it really for me you fasted?” God asked. Interesting question. And a painful one, as well.

And God sits quietly, watching and shaking his head, wondering when we will learn.

Thank God that he doesn’t wash his hands of us.

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