Troubles of Children and Parents by Susan Isaacs

Author:Susan Isaacs [Isaacs, Susan]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Social Science, General, Sociology
ISBN: 9780429619571
Google: igCaDwAAQBAJ
Publisher: Routledge
Published: 2019-05-23T03:47:13+00:00

VII. PHOBIAS AND ANXIETIES

Q.  My little boy, nearly three, used to go to sleep quite happily as soon as he was put to bed, but now as I leave him he calls me back, “Cos Goo-goo comes”. He doesn’t seem very frightened of this imaginary creature, yet it keeps him awake, and he calls me again and again to tell me about “Goo-goo”. At first I told him there was no such person when he said “Goo-goo bites the windows all up, and bites the door and bites everything”, but he insists that there is, so, thinking he might get worse fears through repressing it, I encourage him to talk about it. I suggested Goo goo was a little boy, and little boys didn’t bite windows, etc. only nice things like biscuits and apples. But that was no good. Then he called me in a more frightened voice, and when I told him to shut his eyes and go to sleep, he said, “No, if I shut my eyes Goo-goo will come and eat me”. I know the origin is not from any frightening fairy tales, as I have not allowed them yet. I think it is entirely his own invention, but that the idea of “biting” and of anything frightening comes from the influence of a maid I had recently, and who I discovered was using old- fashioned and wickedly alarming and untrue threats to make him be good. Luckily she had very little to do with him. I don’t think he dreams about it, as he does not appear frightened if he wakes during the night. I’m afraid I do not always keep the calm and cheerful attitude you constantly advise, and which I know so well is right. But it is very difficult to avoid scenes sometimes when he persists in doing a thing after I have forbidden it and explained why I don’t want him to do it (e.g. dragging a chair to the sink, turning the taps full on, and putting Vim, Lux, basins, anything he can get hold of, into it, and getting frightfully wet). I know it must be fun for him, but it’s wrong that he should persist when I ask him not to, and that we should end with a skirmish and tears. He has plenty of outlet for his energies, as he helps with dusting, washes his own socks, etc., and helps to lay the table, and he never tires of his bricks. It is difficult for me to manage him patiently at present, as I have got very run down and, I suppose, a bit nervy since my next baby was born, and through having to look after them both. I have been careful that he should feel no jealousy of the baby, who is now eight months old, and I am sure he does not, although he is inclined to touch her carelessly and might hurt her by mistake if I left them alone.

A.  I think you may

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