This Is Just My Face by Gabourey Sidibe

Author:Gabourey Sidibe
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt

When I got my first film role, no one was more surprised than I was. I did take pleasure in the fact that someone had hired me to star in a real live movie. And I was clear that I wouldn’t have gotten the role if I was skinny. Precious was a role for fat girls only! What a weird world we live in, huh? Lee Daniels said he wanted me to be a star even after Precious; he wanted me to be able to endure the grueling pace of making movies. He immediately signed me up for a gym, hired me a personal trainer, put me in tap-dancing class, and hired a yoga instructor for me. He wanted me to be moving six days a week, and I did. I didn’t complain at all! I was ecstatic that someone was taking charge of my body in this healthy way and, on top of that, paying for it! All I had to do was not eat like an asshole, and that was pretty easy when being a movie star was going to depend on it. I was up every morning at six. I would kind of eat breakfast and then go to the gym to work out with my trainer. Then I’d rehearse with Lee, and then he’d drive me to the production office where Lee’s staff would order me a healthy lunch. I’d do some fittings for clothes, sign some paperwork, have a meeting, and then I’d go to tap-dance class for two or three hours and then home to make myself a healthy dinner, and I did it all again the next day. On the weekends I’d go to yoga. I lost nearly thirty pounds in the first month of this, and for the first time, the only thing I gained was a strong hate for yoga. Fuck yoga yo.

I continued to lose weight as we filmed. When we were done, I stopped the yoga and the tap-dancing lessons. I kept up my good eating habits. I continued going to my trainer, Kris, who was an ex-bouncer and club kid. He was a break-dancer and a karate master. He always knew if I’d skipped breakfast. If I was super catty and mean to him, he understood it meant I was following the meal plan he’d given me and didn’t take offense. He called me Sarcastro because of my sarcastic nature. He and I would work out and talk shit about people who were too dumb to realize how funny we were. No one was more proud of my weight loss than Kris. He helped me to realize how physically strong I was and could be. He taught me the importance of breakfast! (Seriously, I hate breakfast. I spent so many years waiting until I was alone to eat that I don’t even get hungry until around two-ish. On some days, four-ish. My metabolism was as slow as molasses until I started eating breakfast. Now look at me! I’m still fat .

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