The Governess Diaries (The Hellion Club Book 7) by Chasity Bowlin

Author:Chasity Bowlin [Bowlin, Chasity]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Dragonblade Publishing, Inc.
Published: 2023-02-21T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twenty

Effie was silent as the carriage rumbled along. There were too many jumbled thoughts clouding her mind for her to give voice to any of them. He’d left her all those years ago, without a backward glance—or so she’d thought at the time. Now, with his admission that he loved her and her discovery of the letters and other mementos of their past, she was beyond confused about him.

“You’re thinking very loudly,” he noted.

“Why did you tell me that you loved me?” Instantly, she longed to call those words back and her evaporating pride with them! It galled her to sound so desperate and needy, even if that accurately reflected her feelings for him. But more than ever, it was imperative that she know the truth of his heart—before she shared with him her own damning truths.

For the longest time, he remained silent, not saying anything at all. When he did speak, the words were uttered softly. So softly that she had to strain to hear them.

“Because I do love you. Because, despite every effort to the contrary, I have always loved you.”

“What does that mean precisely?”

He shook his head in a gesture of frustration. “What the bloody hell does it ever mean when a man says that he loves a woman?”

“It could mean any number of things,” Effie snapped. “It could mean that you care for me. It could mean that you hold me in the same affection one would a sister or a cousin. It could mean that you value my friendship. Loving someone and being in love with someone are dramatically different things and you owe me some sort of clarification regarding which camp you fall into.”

Effie had no warning. He simply grabbed her and hauled her across the expanse of the carriage until she was completely wrapped in his arms. Had anything ever felt so right? No, she thought, it hadn’t. After all they had been through, the anger and resentments, the fear . . . to be held by him again was simply miraculous. The heat and strength of him that flowed into her, shoring her up when she’d felt so desperately uncertain before, was a thing of beauty. “You have been my friend . . . but so much more. And I have never considered you a sister.”

Effie graced him with an arch look, her brows rising imperiously. “You’re taking liberties.”

“You’re giving them,” he shot back. And then there was no more talking. His lips touched hers, moving over them in a masterful way that left her breathless and flushed.

How could he do that to her with only a kiss? How could he have her desperate and wanting, ready to throw away everything she knew to be right and proper for a chance to once more feel the pleasure he could give her? It was that recklessness he inspired in her, that willingness to throw caution and commonsense to the wind, that had put her in her current delicate condition.

“No,” she finally said, pushing away from him.

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