Read This If You Want to Be a Great Writer by Carroll Henry;Raisin Ross;

Author:Carroll, Henry;Raisin, Ross;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Laurence King Publishing

Getting inside the character’s head

Unlike the last extract, here all of the narrative emanates from inside the main character’s mind. In this sense, close third person (and this is very close) is more akin to first person than to omniscient third-person narration. Rather than the narrative directing the character, the character directs the narrative.

So, because the narrative is rooted inside the consciousness of a person, it meanders, because that is what people’s thoughts do: ‘…yer mind just drifted, away into anything, ye didnt even know, just drifting…’. It is effectively – a regular attribute of Kelman’s fiction – a stream of consciousness. Notice as well the treatment of dialogue. It is not kept distinct from the rest of the text, as omniscient third person normally would do, but instead is brought close to it so that the two rub noses:

‘…but it was difficult, difficult, just like

Dad nudged him. You sleeping?

No.’

Leaving out any punctuation after ‘just like’ gives us a very real appreciation of how Murdo’s dad’s words have interrupted his thoughts, and the omission of speech marks also brings us closer to the spontaneity and muddle that real speech often is, and which the standardized presentation of literature can make appear controlled.

The language slides easily into second person, does away with conventional usage of grammar, and uses colloquial expression – all for a more accurate representation of a consciousness than we would get from the structured form of properly punctuated text:

‘Dad hadnt noticed. The lassies too, ye couldnt help noticing them…’

If not for the few pronouns and the naming of Murdo, this piece could work, technically, in first person. But try swapping them into first person. The narrative loses something of its sap. It becomes more conventional. There is something about the rendering of this text in close third person that defies propriety, and makes it human, alive.

Dirt Road James Kelman 2016

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