Pain by Marni Jackson

Author:Marni Jackson [Jackson, Marni]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-36962-8
Publisher: Random House of Canada
Published: 2002-07-14T16:00:00+00:00

Three months later, he writes:

Tonight’s notes, before I slip off into my pharmaceutical soup: more aches and pains from the aches and pains department. No Demerol. Some Vicodin. The names of these drugs are capitalized as if they were gods. St. Vicodin. Lord Demerol. Our Lady of Cephtazidime. Let’s not forget the great and powerful Zoloft, son of Prosac [sic].

And by October, he is in the hospital, still pounding on the laptop:

Waiting for the nurse to come on who pushes the Demerol, rather than the one who slowly infuses it with the pump. Fuck the pump. Gimmie the push. So what, a 30 second brain rush, is that gonna kill me? With the pump, by the time it’s infused I’m wanting it again. Ah, fuck it. Why don’t I just start shooting heroin like the rest of the junkies? Because I’m still a good boy. A sick boy, but a good boy. And the worst I’ll do is, while the nurse is out of the room I’ll take the Damitall out of the pump and give it a little push. Weeeeee! Like jumping into a nice warm pool. Make no mistake, it’s a tiny push, and a tiny pool. It’s no fucking diving board and I’m certainly not jumping off the roof or anything. But I’ll give myself a couple of pushes here and there, and take a leap now and then, the pain doctor be damned. Weeeeee!

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.