Love and Money, Sex and Death by McKenzie Wark

Author:McKenzie Wark [Wark, McKenzie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Verso Books

When we match, I’m not hopeful. We have writing and books in common, so I propose a walking tour of Lower East Side bookstores. It’s a date.

There’s a bookstore that sells pickles, and you buy pickles. You open the jar on the street as soon as we step out, to taste them right away. That’s the moment I feel. This simple act of claiming a pleasure. A glimpse of capacity for delight. I don’t know when you felt you wanted me.

“You’re the kind of girl love always finds,” says my friend Pet. Maybe, but I so nearly fucked it up from the start. Lying about my age on Tinder, then not owning up to it. You caught me out in the most stupid way: I put my sixtieth birthday party on Insta. To which I hadn’t invited you. I’m lucky you were willing to persist with me. I’ve tried ever since to be as honest as is humanly possible, given that humans are animals that deceive firstly themselves.

It’s been more than a year now. Still going. I can’t tell the story of us, as it’s not a story; it’s a spiral, a situation, a rave.

We go looking for the rave most weekends. We’re in our heads a lot. We’re that kind. We figured out how to make our weird brains work for us. New York is full of people like us. The ruling class needs us to keep spitting out our little twists on the common stock of information. Our weird brains are for sale. We get paid well enough for our weird brain labor. That’s how we pay these exorbitant rents. We need to be near other weirdos. Twisting together, in this city, or at least parts of it, where weirdness is common as breath.

We’re in our heads a lot so need to get back into our bodies. We dance. Not just dance—we rave. Look around this dance floor: it’s weird brain workers, service workers, sex workers. We’re all dancing to the point where selves get lost.

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