Leading So People Will Follow by Erika Andersen

Author:Erika Andersen
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.
Published: 2012-08-26T16:00:00+00:00

3. Review your picks. I’m convinced that toddlers don’t waste any time on the first five (denial, blame, excuses, embarrassment, and self-flagellation). And though they definitely experience the next three (anger, disappointment, and frustration), they quickly move on to the last two: curiosity and determination. It’s what makes them such gifted learners.

The first five reactions will inhibit your ability to learn from experience. If you checked any of them, I imagine you had negative, unhelpful self-talk supporting those reactions. Think about how you could change your self-talk to help you get to curiosity and determination. Write that revised self-talk in your notebook to help anchor it in your head. For instance, if your original self-talk supported anger and blame, you might revise it to be something like this:

When things don’t go the way I expect them to, it’s tough not to take out my frustration on somebody else. But I don’t want to do that: it generally makes things worse. I’ll breathe deeply and focus on using my fair witness skills.

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