Irresistible Prejudice by Lily Holland

Author:Lily Holland [Holland, Lily]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-09-30T18:30:00+00:00

Chapter 7

Charles

I climb into the carriage and wipe the rain off my coat. The journey to London will be long but I have many thoughts to accompany me.

The first rains of fall are spreading over the country and I would rather spend the season at home, but my heart calls me to the city.

Ever since last spring, a few months ago, when Selina Heathfield visited me, I have been fighting with a feeling of estrangement. It is a hard thing to combat and a harder one to face when you are very aware it is all your fault. I have been thinking on what has happened, on what should have happened, on what I wanted to happen and my mind has taken me back in time on a great many occasions.

I miss Selina, I wouldn’t even try to deny it anymore, not even to myself. I hated her for so long that seeing her face in my mansion awoke feelings deeply buried inside me. I thought they were only made of anger and scorn but the lack of her made me face the truth. Maybe I hated her so much because I wanted her to love me when we were children…

An old feud, that’s all it was, and it wasn’t even one, she didn’t know it existed because I tried to get a blind revenge on her. Over her, over her body. I despise the look in my eyes that made her feel unwanted by me. Ever since she left after only two days spent here, I have felt like a failure in everything I do. I tried to apologize to her but my letters keep coming back to me without having been opened. She doesn’t want to see me, talk to me nor write.

I took a few days before sending the letters she wrote to my uncle and her father. Our engagement has been called off, both of the older men apologizing to me for Selina’s intransigence. I didn’t have the heart to lie and be resentful for a hurt pride, but the result still stings badly.

It takes a few days to reach my mansion in London and I am happy to finally settle down. I have not missed the city, it has always been too loud for me, I much prefer the countryside, the wide valleys, the green landscape, the quiet lakes, the unmerciful weather. I miss it already and I’ve just got here.

The day following my arrival, my tailor provides me with the suit I have ordered a few weeks ago and I dress up for the night.

There is a party at Lord Devinan’s house tonight and I have been invited as I always am. I don’t usually attend, but today I felt I had to come. There are going to be a great number of people tonight and I am interested in only one of them.

The house is a few paces away from my own home and I present myself to the door at seven. Many

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