I Fail at the Afterlife by Anni Sezate

Author:Anni Sezate
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Anni Sezate
Published: 2023-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

23

WHITE MEXICANS

As much as I’d dreaded it, and as depressing as it was, I actually kind of enjoyed those couple days leading up to the funeral. I just like it when the whole family is together. It’s sad that it takes someone dying for it to happen. Also, it had been a long time since me, Sam, and Elena were in the same room with each other. It didn’t happen often, but every now and then we used to all subtly end up with no plans on a Saturday night and stay up late playing Disney Monopoly, watching Star Wars or Indiana Jones (depending on which version of Harrison Ford we felt like at the time), and arguing about stupid stuff.

We once had an argument over which one of us was the most Mexican, which is hilarious because we’re all super white. We’re what I call “white Mexicans.” Basically, that means that we have a foot in that culture, and it’s a big part of us that we cherish, but it’s nothing compared to first- and second-generation immigrants. If we actually went to Mexico, we’d just come across as a bunch of Americans. Also, the white thing is literal in mine and Sam’s case. I don’t know why Elena was the only one that came out looking like Mom.

On the night of that ridiculous argument—over which of us was the most Mexican—we were all sitting on the carpet in old pajamas with most of the lights off except for the glow of the TV and a lamp shining on our Monopoly board.

I took a bite of my fudgesicle and said, “We all know I’m the most Mexican. I can speak Spanish. Kind of. Well not really, but more than you guys.”

“That doesn’t make you more Mexican,” Elena argued, her pink braces glowing in the dark. “You learned it from school and stuff, not from your family.”

“What, you’re saying you’re more Mexican?” I laughed, causing me to drool a bit of fudge.

Elena blinked and said dryly, “I’m brown and my name is Maria.”

“That doesn’t count. You go by Elena, and you don’t even say it right. It’s el-EN-uh, not uh-LAY-nuh.”

“What about me?” asked Sam, putting a castle on the Toy Story space. Elena groaned and threw a Cheeto at his head.

I picked it up and ate it, just to gross out Elena. Then, I pointed at Sam with my fudgesicle. “You’re not even in the running, guero.”

Sam narrowed his eyes at me. “Don’t even go there, Baby Blues. Plus, I eat the most like a Mexican. Which one of us eats menudo on New Year’s and actually likes it? I have the appetite of a true Mexican. I can take the spice better than you two, and I eat a lot. I ate almost as many tamales as Tata last week.”

“And you’ll get a panza just like Tata if you keep it up,” I muttered.

“I like menudo . . .” Elena said weakly.

I shook my head. “You like the watered-down version without the hooves and stomach and crap.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.