High Tide by Alyson Santos

Author:Alyson Santos [Santos, Alyson]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-06-04T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twelve: Poolside Lies

Gram is pretty forgiving when I tell her about the prison visit fail. It’s evident in her response that she never expected me to go through with it anyway. She offers something generous like, “well, it means a lot that you tried.” Tried. That’s the problem. I tried, and I’m not a person who tries. I do. That’s the point of the lists. Those pages are stocked full of successes because only sure-wins make the cut. The lists are law. They’re order. A risky prison visit slipped through security and look how that turned out. This is also why relationships with Slovak lifeguards can’t be included. Not that the stupid part of my brain always agrees.

While logical brain is busy sorting and filtering, stupid brain keeps replaying yesterday’s beach visit. It remembers every detail of Christian’s face when he saw me, his posture when I fought my reaction. I did well ignoring the thunder of blood as I passed near him on my way back from the heart-to-heart with Harper. I doubt he even knows how every neuron in my brain crackled when his eyes grazed mine. How twenty-four hours later small surges still rush through me with each flash of that moment. My brain and body are so at odds that when Harper asks if I want to go to the beach, my brain says no while my lips say “sure.” Sadly, Harper goes with my lips on this one, so here we are, settling way too close to the lifeguard chair when today’s guardian turns out to be her ridiculously-hot iguana boy.

Jakub flaunts a wide smile as we pass, and I’m just grateful my drama with Christian hasn’t impacted Harper’s relationship with Jakub. It must be nice to hang out and have fun and not agonize over questions of soul-connections and forevers. A summer fling. Such a normal, acceptable reality for a college student. But I’ll never be attracted to playboys like Jakub or Tanner who make flings possible. No, apparently I need haunting enigmatic puzzles that burrow into unsafe recesses of your heart, and when Harper drags me to lunch with Jakub, I’m stuck in an awkward confrontation with my ghost.

Christian’s expression was unreadable when his gaze rested on me after meeting up with us at a resort pool deck between where the guys are stationed. It didn’t help that Harper and Jakub had immediately scurried off to do heaven knows what for the hour break, leaving us alone. Now, Christian and I sit awkwardly at the pool’s edge, watching our feet dangle in the water. His homemade lunch remains untouched in the plastic bag beside him. If his stomach feels like mine, he won’t be eating it.

“How have you been?” I ask, trying not to focus on how amazing he looks in his fitted tee that seems to further reflect the colored specks in his eyes when they catch the sun. It’s funny the things you forget when you’re trying to forget someone.

“I am fine.

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