Essentials of Negotiation by Roy J. Lewicki
Author:Roy J. Lewicki
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: The McGraw-Hill Companies
Published: 2006-06-26T05:00:00+00:00
TABLE 6.2 Questions for Tough Situations
2. Acknowledgment is the second form of listening, slightly more active than passive listening. When acknowledging, receivers occasionally nod their heads, maintain eye contact, or interject responses like “I see,” “mm-hmm,” “interesting,” “really,” “sure,” “go on,” and the like. These responses are sufficient to keep communicators sending messages, but a sender may misinterpret them as the receiver's agreement with his or her position, rather than as simple acknowledgments of receipt of the message.
3. Active listening is the third form. When receivers are actively listening, they restate or paraphrase the sender's message in their own language. Here are a few examples of active listening:38
SENDER: I don't know how I am going to untangle this messy problem.
RECEIVER: You're really stumped on how to solve this one.
SENDER: Please, don't ask me about that now.
RECEIVER: Sounds like you're awfully busy right now.
SENDER: I thought the meeting today accomplished nothing.
RECEIVER: You were very disappointed with our session.
In negotiation, it may appear initially that active listening is unsuitable because, unlike a counselor, the receiver normally has a set position and may feel strongly about the issues. By recommending active listening we are not suggesting that receivers should automatically agree with the other party's position and abandon their own. Rather, we are suggesting that active listening is a skill that encourages people to speak more fully about their feelings, priorities, frames of reference, and, by extension, the positions they are taking. When the other party does so, negotiators will better understand his or her positions, the factors and information that support it, and the ways the position can be compromised, reconciled, or negotiated in accordance with their own preferences and priorities.
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