Rock Fever by Theresa Hodge
Author:Theresa Hodge [Hodge, Theresa]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Theresa Hodge
Published: 2018-08-14T16:00:00+00:00
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
BLADE
I cried for the sake of a woman for the first time in my life. This was my entire fault. I’d ruined what we had. I tore her heart into pieces with my own hands—no one else was to blame but me.
‘I want you to stay the hell away from me and don’t ever come back here.’
The sound of her voice and her bitter words re-echoed in my brain. No matter what I tried to do to break free from her spell, no matter what I did to get the memory of Kira out of my mind, I failed.
Thoughts of her fueled my bones. Looking at her pictures online, as I was doing now, gave me hope that one day she may reconsider, but after her cold reception of me at her workplace, I had a feeling it was all over.
I knew I had a problem. Drugs and alcohol had always been a problem since my teenage days. My mother had dumped me and my father for some other man whom she now had kids with. That left a wound inside me, one that I carried from a tender age.
Though I was drop-dead handsome, I lacked confidence in myself. I battled, had low self-esteem, and buried my pain in drugs. Taking the Trash Monkeys this far was a miracle, but I had to fight hard to let the drugs and alcohol go for good.
They’d done nothing but take away my happiness. Now Kira was gone, and I was left alone. If I didn’t stand up to the fight, sooner or later I’d start losing friendships, and eventually the Trash Monkeys would go down the drain. This was because whenever I got high, I found no motivation to do a new song or write my lyrics.
“You still on that, mate?” Starburst sauntered into my hotel room with two cups.
We were on tour in Ohio, but I had sneaked out just to see her face, just to make sure she was doing fine.
I couldn’t take my eyes off the picture of Kira on my computer screen. ‘It didn’t work out, she pushed me away,” I answered him.
Though the Trash Monkeys was a network of childhood friends, I was closest to the drummer, Starburst. He seemed to understand my personality. He never judged my mistakes and he knew about my relationship with Kira because I had opened up to him when she had ended things. Starburst was the one who’d told me about her job. Hearing the news from someone else made me feel worse because I’d never truly pressed her about what she did for a living. I was too damn caught up with getting high.
I was a total jackass! I never cared to know her genuinely. I don’t know what she does for a living, the name of her family, friends, and so much more. I had been obsessed with myself. I saw why she never wanted us to get back.
“So, you plan on letting Kira go?” Starburst dropped a cup next to my computer.
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