Wired for Madness by Peter Orullian

Author:Peter Orullian [Orullian, Peter]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Fiction
Publisher: Peter Orullian
Published: 2019-11-19T00:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER EIGHT

THERE WAS A moment of unease and a flash of light behind my eyes as Dr. Bill hooked up two terminal cables to the data-ports in my head. “Easy,” I told him.

“Apologies,” said Bill. “I sometimes forget the interface discharge when we place the cables for calibration—a kind of digital discord with the brain.”

I just nodded that it was okay, my eyesight slowly returning.

“So, before we address any issues, how has your transition been, generally speaking?” He clasped his hands, waiting.

“Fine I guess,” I answered. “I don’t really have anything to compare it to. But, it has definitely been . . . interesting.”

“Oh,” said Bill, his eyebrows rising, “in what way?”

I took a breath and sighed it out. “Well, to be honest, I haven’t put this new ‘mind-space,’ as you call it, to much use yet. I’ve enjoyed the relief of being unencumbered by a few of the trivialities, and just kind of left it at that for the most part.”

Bill chuckled. “Nine out of ten patients do the same, Robert. In some real respects, you’ve earned the right to coast for a bit.”

I half-smiled, until the memory of the night at Custer’s returned to me. “But when I do open up to this new mind-space . . .”

Bill leaned in. “Yes, what is it?”

I looked up into his eager eyes. “Let’s just say it feels very real. Too real. And not at all like I’m moving beyond the past.”

“I don’t follow,” said Bill.

I paused, not sure how to say it. “It’s almost like I’m being haunted.”

I’d anticipated Bill’s face twisting down into question or concern. Instead, his furrowed brow relaxed, and his own affable smile rose in his cheeks. “Ah, well Robert, that is nothing to be concerned about. You see, the experiential of the deep mind is such that it achieves the characteristics of reality. Actually, it is this quality that engenders new thought and new ideas with the clarity needed to actualize them, make them real.”

I waited a moment. “Even if I’m hearing voices?”

He placed a hand on my shoulder. “Some would say that reality is a construct of the mind. If you’re experiencing ideas and places and conversations that exhibit all the qualities of sensory stimulus, then you’ve nothing to worry about.”

“Really?”

“Really. And it’s not as if there’s some kind of afterlife your touching.” He chuckled warmly and consulted a chart he’d been holding in one hand. “That said, it is good you came in for a calibration. You see, your duress from these moments of deeper thought result from not being able to recognize them for what they are. You’re being drawn into the world of new ideas so completely that you’re forgetting yourself.”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “But isn’t that the whole point of CRP?”

Bill tapped my chart, smiling his patient smile. “Not really. We’re striving for a better version of you—one grounded, as it were, in the here-and-now, but given leave to pursue and grasp new combinations of understanding that can be introduced back to those of us with only our birth-mind.

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