Time Storm by Gordon Dickson

Author:Gordon Dickson [Dickson, Gordon]
Format: epub
Tags: sf
Published: 2010-11-01T23:00:00+00:00

It would have been no effort for him to have taken the gun from me. He could have easily broken the arm mat held it or throttled me with one .hand. But he had done none of these. Instead he had merely come as close as he ever must have come in his life to pleading with someone to spare him, to accept him, to be his fellow, if not his friend.

210

TIME STORM

In that same moment I realized that he—strange as ft seemed and incredible as it was that he should have the capability, just from that solitary shared moment in the monad—understood better than any of mem how Sunday had felt about me, and how I had felt about Sunday. In Us animal-human eyes I read it, how I had reaOy felt about Sunday; and at last—at last—4 fell apart

I bad been right both ways. I had been right in mat I was someone who did not know how to love. But 1 had been wrong, nt spite of this, when I told myself I had not loved the crazy cat. AH this I undentood suddenly, at last, fat the moment in which the Old Man squatted before me, with one long hand still laid flat against my shut, over the spot where my fist and the revolver mat was to have killed him were concealed. Hie floodgates within me went down suddenly and I was washed halfway back again once more to the shores of humanity. Only halfway, but mis was farther than I had ever been before.

23

I sat mere and cried for a long time; and the Old Man waited me out as he might have waited out a storm, squatting in a cave in the hills. When it was over, I was sane again; or at least as dose to sanity as I could expect to be, under the circumstances. Together we went back to the camp, and from men on, he was openly at my side most of the daylight hours.

What he had done, of course, was to crack the protective shell I had grown about myself in reaction to the massive internal effort of controlled power that had been involved in using the monad. In doing that, I had discovered muscles of the tamer self that I had not known I owned, and I had abo tuned myself up emotionally with a vengeance. In self-defense, with Sunday's death, my mind had closed itself off until it could heal the psychic tearings these stresses had created. Now that I was back in my skull, however, these things were suddenly very obvious to me; and some other things as weH Chief of these was mat mere was a great deal I needed to do with myself if I wanted to continue my joust with the time storm and the universe.

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