The World Record Book of Racist Stories by Amber Ruffin

Author:Amber Ruffin
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Published: 2022-11-08T00:00:00+00:00

Most Racist Pilot

When they were young, Chrystal and Angie took aviation classes. And it’s at this point I realize I forgot to say, Mom and Dad put us in all kinds of classes. Learning new stuff was always encouraged. You were allowed to take whatever weird classes you wanted. Or if there was a special summer school program you wanted to be a part of, you could! Ruffins love to take classes about things they know nothing about. Awww man, I wish I had a picture of when we all took a belly dancing class. That was the best time I’ve ever had while being the absolute worst I’ve ever been at anything. So, Angie and Chrystal are in this aviation class and it’s them and a bunch of little white boys. The teacher, a pilot, comes hot out the gate with: “Piloting is not for everyone. There are plenty of careers you have to choose from.” Then, this piece of shit looks right at Chrystal and Angie and says, “Some people are more cut out for departments like housekeeping.” They went right home and told Mom. And you best believe that after a stern talking-to, this man figured out how to act right. Chrystal and Angie are now pilots for Delta Airlines. Just kidding.

But that talking-to did fix his attitude problem right then and there! And not to put too fine a point on it, but why would you say this to children? Are you scared that the little white boys would feel equal to the little Black girls? Or were you just getting off on being mean to little Black children? Or, and this is the true one: BOTH.

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