The Unceasing Storm by Katherine Luo

Author:Katherine Luo [Luo, Katherine]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Biography & Autobiography, Personal Memoirs, Women, History, Asia, China
ISBN: 9781771621878
Google: AERPDwAAQBAJ
Publisher: Douglas & McIntyre
Published: 2018-03-31T04:13:19+00:00

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Diary

A frightening incident occurred at the beginning of the Cultural Revolution. Li, one of the young actors in the drama group of the Air Force Art Troupe, threw himself fervently into the “revolution that touched the soul of the whole population.” In response to calls from the Communist Party and Chairman Mao, and determined to cut himself off from his past, he took the initiative to hand over his diary to the Party, fearlessly baring his heart in an effort to obtain guidance. He never dreamed that the Party, without scruples, would expose him to the public. In truth, he had written nothing more serious than some questions he had failed to think through. As a result, however, he was subjected to serious admonitions and public censure for venting his discontent. His diary, they said, revealed “corrupt capitalist thinking.” The authorities incited the whole troupe to go to the drama group and study the big-character posters denouncing him and to attend the public criticism sessions devoted to his wrongdoings.

The incident made a deep impression on me, for I also kept diaries. What calamity would befall me if my diaries were exposed? I was terrified at the thought.

In 1968, when the Cultural Revolution began the Cleansing of Class Ranks campaign, the danger was upon me. I knew I could be made into an example. With Li’s diary in mind, and driven by anxiety, I went to my eldest sister and gave her several diaries, together with the last letter my father had written to my siblings and me, and asked her to burn everything in secret. I would be in unimaginable trouble if they were discovered. My father’s letter would be especially damning, since in it he had answered the accusations my sister and brother had levelled against him. Unfortunately, I overlooked two further diaries in a large leather trunk I seldom opened.

One weekend, I took advantage of the rare luck of a moment alone to burn some letters from a former boyfriend. Just as the papers were burning, several people rushed into my room. A key female member of the gang rushed toward the metal container. “Look! She’s burning documents!” She took a glass of water from the desk and threw its contents onto the fire. She then stirred the ashes with her hand in an attempt to salvage what was left of the burnt pages.

More people dashed in, with Liu, the political assistant of the director, among them. His look was severe. “What are you doing? Destroying evidence?”

“I am just burning my personal letters,” I said. “You all know I broke up with Chufan; I don’t want to keep his letters.”

Assistant Liu looked closely in the metal bucket, and even gave it a shake. Only ashes were left in it. “Who can prove that you’ve got only love letters in there?” he asked.

The entire leftist gang crowded around me, emboldened by the power of their position, shouting, “Stop your pretenses and own up to the truth!”

Struggling to

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