The Sober Curious Reset by Ruby Warrington

Author:Ruby Warrington [Warrington, Ruby]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Running Press
Published: 2020-12-02T00:00:00+00:00

“People crave comfort, people crave connection, people crave community.”

—MARIANNE WILLIAMSON

Why is it easier to bond when everyone feels like sh*t?

Something else you may feel like you’re missing out on, is the bonding that happens when you get stuck into a good old bitch-fest with the booze. Not to mention the hungover camaraderie that can occur the day after the drinking, when everybody feels like sh*t. It can sometimes seem like nasty gossip and banging hangovers act as a great leveler. We get to empathize with each other’s struggles, and express sympathy from a place of shared pain. But this is a version of the “lowest common denominator” effect; all that’s really happening is that everybody has congregated at the same miserable level.

Misery being a state we are culturally very comfortable with. Think about how much easier it is to share a sad story or to downplay our achievements, than to “brag” about something good that happened or highlight something we really like about ourselves. How the news cycle tends to focus on negative or traumatic events, while any “good news” is reported as an afterthought. It also explains our cultural mistrust of people who appear “naively optimistic,” and the hate that gets hurled at anybody who appears to “love themselves” too much. Which, again, is not to deny the more difficult parts of life. If we were able to empathize with each other about what really hurts, we might live in a very different world. While we’re here getting curious, why is it that we have such a mistrust of the good stuff?

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