The Mince Pie Mix-Up by Jennifer Joyce

Author:Jennifer Joyce [Joyce, Jennifer]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2015-11-24T13:00:00+00:00

Chapter Thirteen:

There’s a Rumour Doing the Rounds

Calvin couldn’t get used to this waking-up-at-the-crack-of-dawn thing. Before the crack of dawn, actually. The village was in complete darkness as he stood in his kitchen, shivering in Judy’s pink dressing gown as the heating hadn’t kicked in yet. His family slept soundly upstairs as he measured and sieved and rubbed flour and butter into every crevice on his fingers. His only company was Miller, who sat watching him from his basket, conveying how much he wanted to go out for a walk through doleful eyes.

‘In a minute, buddy. I just need to get these in the oven.’ Calvin dumped a pastry star on top of each mince pie, giving them a quick egg wash before he slipped the first lot into the oven. Miller’s ears pricked up but still Calvin worked, getting started on the next batch. Miller sighed loudly from the basket.

‘A few more minutes and then I’ll take you out.’ Calvin checked the time. He was running on schedule. As long as there were no major hiccups, he’d be fine. ‘Miller, noooooooo!’

Miller, who had vacated his basket and was now squatting in the middle of the kitchen, kept his eyes glued on Calvin’s as his body quivered, his eyes bulging as he curled a turd out on the lino. Calvin was sure the dog’s lips twitched into a grin as it plopped onto the floor. Dropping onto the lino, his hind legs pointing out in front of him, Miller used his front paws to shuffle himself across the kitchen, wiping his doggy butt on the floor.

‘Bad dog!’ Calvin was in a flap as he attempted to scrape the butter-and-flour mixture from his fingers but it was like glue. In the end he wiped his hands on a tea towel before grabbing a dog poop bag and scooping the offending lump off the floor. ‘Outside, now!’ Calvin marched the dog into the back garden, where he dumped the bag in the wheelie bin before returning to the kitchen. After giving his hands – and the kitchen floor – a thorough scrubbing (surely picking up dog shit contravened health and safety rules a million times over), he resumed his baking to the soundtrack of Miller howling outside.

‘Can’t you shut the dog up?’ Judy asked as she appeared bleary-eyed in the kitchen doorway. ‘You’ll wake the whole street.’

‘He crapped on the floor,’ Calvin explained as he arranged the pastry in the bun tins. ‘He’s out there as punishment.’

‘Has he been for a walk yet?’ Judy crossed the kitchen and opened the door. The howling ceased as Miller bounced inside, his tail now wagging joyfully.

Calvin grabbed the pot of mincemeat and spooned it into the pastry cases. ‘It’s next on my list.’

Judy tutted. ‘No wonder he had an accident. You need to take him out otherwise he’ll have no choice but to do it on the floor.’ Judy scratched behind the dog’s ears. ‘It isn’t his fault.’

‘I know that!’ Calvin grabbed the first batch of mince pies from the oven and placed them on a cooling rack.

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