The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood

Author:Tony Attwood
Language: eng
Format: mobi, pdf
ISBN: 9781846425592
Publisher: Jessica Kingsley Publishers
Published: 2006-09-27T22:00:00+00:00

LEARNING WHEN TO TALK ABOUT THE INTEREST

If a conversation includes talking about the special interest, the child or adult with Asperger’s syndrome usually has to learn the relevant cues and responses to ensure the conversation is reciprocal and inclusive. Activities can be undertaken to ‘spot the message’ that indicates that the listener is bored, embarrassed or annoyed. The person with Asperger’s syndrome may have to be reminded to make regular checks on the other person’s perception of the conversation and his or her potential contribution, looking for nods of approval and signs of being genuinely interested. If the person with Asperger’s syndrome is unsure about the signals, he or she needs to learn to seek information by comments or questions such as ‘I hope that this isn’t boring you’ or ‘and what are your thoughts and opinions on this?’ The person with Asperger’s syndrome also seems to have a different time perception when talking about the interest and needs to be aware of how long the monologue has dominated the conversation. As previously noted, time goes quickly when one is having fun.

Sometimes parents or teachers have a ‘secret sign’ for the child with Asperger’s syndrome that indicates that he or she needs to recognize and respond to the subtle signals from the other child, and to incorporate the friend’s knowledge and suggestions, or switch the topic to the other child’s interests. The child with Asperger’s syndrome may also need explicit information on who may or may not be an appropriate person to engage in a conversation about the interest. One can use the concept of concentric circles of relationships, whereby for those people within the inner circles, such as the family, relatives and close friends, the topic could be appropriate. However, for people who are less well known, the person with Asperger’s syndrome may need to be more aware of the context and social cues before engaging in a conversation about the special interest.

A teenager with Asperger’s syndrome was aware that, when starting a conversation with a stranger, he should wait a while before talking about his special interest. He wanted my advice on how soon it would be appropriate for him to tell an attractive teenage girl about his interest in visiting cemeteries, and recording the inscriptions on gravestones. He did at least recognize the importance of just a few minutes before embarking on an enthusiastic description of all the cemeteries in the city.

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