Sure of You by Armistead Maupin

Author:Armistead Maupin [Maupin, Armistead]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi, pdf
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

“What?” Michael scanned the room guiltily, as if there were Jehovah’s Witnesses present, or grownups who might overhear them.

“You mean his…?”

The cop shook his head with a dry smile. “Somebody else’s.”

Reaching below the desk, he retrieved a plastic shop-134

ping bag and handed it to Michael. “Check it out.”

Inside the bag was a box bearing a glossy likeness of Jeff Stryker, the porn star.

“What the hell?”

“Read it,” said the cop.

The label said: The Realistic Jeff Stryker Cock and Balls. Incredibly awesome in size! Molded directly from Jeff’s erect cock! Looks and feels amazingly realistic!

He opened the end of the box, to reveal a velvet bag with a drawstring.

“I wouldn’t take it out,” said Bill.

“Right.”

“The balls are squeezable.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope.”

“What’s the world coming to?” said Michael.

Bill chuckled, but it was a dry, professional chuckle. “Got an address for him?”

“I’m sorry. I don’t.”

“Think you could phone it in later? For my report.”

“Sure,” said Michael. “No problem.”

“So.” The cop looked up from the clipboard. “How have you been?”

“Pretty good. I’m alive.”

“Yeah. Really. Are you still…on your own?”

“No. I’ve got a lover now.”

“Hey. All right. Where’d you meet him?”

“Alcatraz, actually.”

This got a smile. “A tourist or a ranger?”

“Tourist.”

“And then he moved here?”

Michael nodded. “About three years ago.”

“Well, good for you.” If Bill was racked with heartbreak, his police training had taught him to conceal it pretty well.

“How ’bout you?” asked Michael.

“Same as always. Bachelor Number Three.”

“Well…it suits you.”

“You got that right. What would I do with a lover at Pigs in Paradise?”

135

Michael drew a blank.

“You know, the big party. Gay and lesbian law enforcement. I took you to one, didn’t I?”

“Nope.”

“You sure?”

Michael rolled his eyes. “I would’ve remembered, Bill. Trust me.”

“Come to the next one, then. Bring your lover.”

“Thanks. Maybe we’ll do that.”

“I’ll go get him,” said Bill.

He gave Michael’s shoulder a brotherly shake and ducked into the back room.

Joe Webster emerged looking gaunt and exhausted, his rangy frame slumped into a sullen pterodactyl stance. When his eyes met Michael’s they registered no recognition whatsoever.

“Here’s your friend,” the officer told him.

“He’s not my friend.”

“This is Michael Tolliver. You said to call Michael Tolliver, didn’t you?”

No answer.

Bill smiled indulgently and looked at Michael. “Is this the guy?”

Michael nodded. “He’s right, though. We’re not really friends.”

Bill shrugged. “Well…”

“The bastards wouldn’t give me a room,” said Joe, scowling. “And they’re outa fuckin’ towels.”

“Did you reach his Shanti buddy?”

“Not yet.” Michael turned to Joe and tried to appear as benign as possible. “Why don’t we go see Ramon? O.K.?”

“Where is he? Where’s Ramon?”

“He’s at home. Or he will be soon.” He hoped to hell this was so.

“I’m gonna take you there, O.K.?”

“No fuckin’ towels. What the fuck do they think I’m doing? I paid, didn’t I? Didn’t I pay?”

136

“What’s he talking about?” asked Michael.

“Got me. What’re you gonna do if you can’t find his buddy?”

“I dunno.”

“You have a work number for him?”

“He works out of his house. He must be out shopping or something.”

“No fuckin’ towels, no fuckin’ rooms…”

“Maybe you should call again,” said Bill.

This time Ramon was home. Michael told him what had happened and offered to drive Joe to Ramon’s house in Bernal Heights.

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