Say What You Will by McGovern Cammie

Author:McGovern, Cammie
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperTeen

UNCORRECTED E-PROOF—NOT FOR SALE

HarperCollins Publishers

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CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

NONE OF THIS WAS going the way Matthew wanted it to. Picking Amy up and talking to her parents had made him more nervous than he expected it to. So nervous it wasn’t until they were inside the hotel lobby that he really saw how lovely she looked tonight. But why did seeing Amy in her dress awaken such a panic? Was it the neckline shaped like a U so he could see her collarbone and the sprinkling of freckles across her chest? Was it how he felt standing beside her, waiting to get their picture taken? Was it letting himself really look at her body for the first time? He almost couldn’t believe it. She was beautiful.

Amy’s body had always been a mystery to him. He recognized parts of it, of course. He’d seen her barefoot before and knew the way her toes stuck up and her ankles went rigid. Her feet were her most despised body part, she once told him, because they were the main thing that kept her from walking better. The one time he saw her feet up close, she’d scraped her ankle and he examined it to see if she was all right. Doing that, he surprised himself by discovering that he didn’t mind holding her strange foot in his hand. In fact he started rubbing it, wondering if he could soften the stiffness with a massage. When had he ever done anything like that? Now he thought about tonight and a new fear skated down his spine. How did he expect this evening to end?

Too late, he realized: they’d thought too much about the logistics of getting here and not enough about what they would do here. She’d already told him she didn’t want to dance. She also told him about Sanjay’s stupid plan to spike other people’s drinks.

“Do we have to drink?” he asked her nervously.

“OF COURSE NOT,” she said. “I’M ONLY A CONDUIT. IT’LL BE OVER IN TWENTY MINUTES, HE PROMISES. TOPS.”

Matthew didn’t care about that. He didn’t care about seeing Sanjay or Sarah or any of these people they were supposedly friends with, but weren’t really. The only thing he really wanted to do was find a quiet spot to sit down with Amy and talk.

With all the joking around and preparation for prom, they hadn’t been able to do this for a while, which meant he hadn’t gotten to tell Amy what had been happening with him. How the world had begun to feel different with his medication. How he noticed certain changes, especially at work, where he was getting to be friends with the rest of the staff. It’s like I don’t have to spend so much time in my head. I can actually have conversations. If they found a spot to talk, maybe he could ask what was going on earlier tonight with her parents. Why her father seemed so nervous and her mother so angry. They obviously weren’t as happy about Amy going to prom as he’d thought they’d be.

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