Resolving Conflicts at Work by Kenneth Cloke & Goldsmith Joan & Bennis Warren

Author:Kenneth Cloke & Goldsmith, Joan & Bennis, Warren
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Wiley
Published: 2011-01-03T00:00:00+00:00

Separating Elements in Conflict to Encourage Resolution

When we are in conflict, we tend to lump the issues that upset us into a mass of indistinguishable complaints. Yet as long as they are intertwined, it is difficult to negotiate, fix, or resolve them. As strange as it may seem, simply creating distinctions or separations between any of the elements in your conflict can produce a significant shift in your ability to approach them constructively.

These separations can transform your attitude toward conflict from passive, reactive, and powerless to self-possessed, proactive, and strategic. They will signal your readiness to transition from focusing on listening and emotional processing to focusing on problem solving and negotiation. With these separations, we are able to break seemingly monolithic issues down into easy-to-handle, bite-sized pieces using a set of uncomplicated tools. In doing so, we more easily discover solutions and increase our opponent’s willingness to implement them.

The following “separations” should allow you to see your conflicts more clearly, identify strategies for tackling each issue separately, and make it easier to transform the whole.

• Separate positions from interests

• Separate people from problems

• Separate problems from solutions

• Separate commonalities from differences

• Separate the future from the past

• Separate emotion from negotiation

• Separate process from content

• Separate options from choices

• Separate criteria from selection

• Separate yourself from others

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