Okay Fine Whatever by Courtenay Hameister

Author:Courtenay Hameister
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company
Published: 2018-07-30T16:00:00+00:00

As I was dating Joe, I continued to trade messages with Jeremy.

He would periodically check in with me on OkCupid chat.

JEREMY: Hey! How’s it going?

ME: Okay. But I’m getting frustrated. Why doesn’t anyone have a sense of humor?

JEREMY: It’s Portland. Everyone’s in their safe space.

ME: True. I’m in mine right now. (It’s the Ikea cafeteria.) How’s by you?

JEREMY: I’m okay. I’m with this girl who wants me to pee on her, though.

ME: Holy shit. What’d you say?1

JEREMY: I already had sex with her in front of her boyfriend at his request. I feel like I’ve done my due diligence with this person.

ME: Come on. You did not do that.

JEREMY: He had a voyeur thing.

ME: What was it like?

JEREMY: It was like fucking, but I was just more conscious of what my gut looked like from the side.

ME: Now you know what it’s like for women to have sex.

JEREMY: Touché. Anyway, he’s her boyfriend…he should pee on her. Not me.

ME: See? If I didn’t know you, I wouldn’t know that rule.

JEREMY: Yeah, you’re welcome.

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