November by David Mamet

Author:David Mamet [Mamet, David]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
ISBN: 9780573698125
Publisher: Samuel French Trade
Published: 2008-06-24T04:00:00+00:00

ACT THREE

The office, morning.

The President is changing his shirt and shaving.

CHARLES: (To phone) Barry. Yes. I’m surprised you still have my number. (Pause) Yaas. You heard that? Waal, we have quote, set aside a little money for a little airtime. (Pause. ARCHER enters with a tray, bearing coffee and so on.) Oh, two hundred million dollars. Waal, Barry, we’ve got an “election” coming up, and, waal, we sort of, thought we’d like to “win” it. (Pause) We got it from some “people” you know …

ARCHER: … What does he want …?

CHARLES: (Covering phone) He heard we made a little “air buy.” (To phone) Yes. It is a lot of money to spend in ONE WEEK, IN THE LAST WEEK, BARRY, BEFORE THAT ELECTION IN WHICH YOU AND THE COMMITTEE KICKED ME TO THE CURB. (To ARCHER) “Why didn’t we check with him?” (CHARLES hands the phone to ARCHER.)

ARCHER: (To phone) Waal, Barry, we didn’t check with you ’cause you told us to “go fuck” ourselves …

CHARLES: (Seizing the phone) Gimme that phone … (To phone) No, Barry, we did not “take your remarks out of context,” so, let’s skip the lovemaking, and what do you want? (To ARCHER) He wants to “get on board.” (Pause) Well, Barry, you have me at a disadvantage because I don’t give a fuck. (To ARCHER) He’s found some money … (To phone) Where did the money come from, Barry? ’Cause, yesterday you were broke? Did you forget to look in the GLOVE COMPARTMENT? Barry? Did you forget to look behind the couch? ’Cause “behind the couch” that’s where I always look, when I need to find two hundred million dollars, to help out my friend, to who you swore undying brotherhood, and then turned around and cut him off at the ankles with ONE SPOT IN CINCINNATI and his wife had to CRY HERSELF TO SLEEP because you wouldn’t even have the courtesy to buy him a LIBRARY, after everything he did for you. D’YOU LOOK BEHIND THE COUCH? What?

(Pause.)

ARCHER: What’s he saying?

CHARLES: (To Archer) He’s calling upon me to be the bigger man. (To phone) No—you’re right, you’re right, Barr—yesterday was yesterday, today’s today, and we go on. (Pause) You’re right—we have to work together. And we have no choice—you’re right—not at all. Not at all. Barr, thank you—and on we go. (Hangs up phone. To ARCHER) Call the IRS and have him audited back to the day he was born.

(Pause. The phone rings. ARCHER answers.)

ARCHER: Send him in.

(TURKEY GUY enters.)

TURKEY GUY: Mr. President.

CHARLES: Yes.

TURKEY GUY: I had to move the turkeys from their climate-controlled capsule.

CHARLES: Where are they now?

TURKEY GUY: They’re in the outer office.

CHARLES: That’s lovely.

TURKEY GUY: And they need to smell your hand.

CHARLES: All right.

TURKEY GUY: And, Sir, there are people coughing in the anteroom.

ARCHER: (To phone) Tell the people in the anteroom to stop coughing.

TURKEY GUY: And we would like to see the speech.

ARCHER: You need to see the speech?

TURKEY GUY: Yes.

ARCHER: We need to see the money.

TURKEY GUY: And I need you to permit the turkeys to smell your hand.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.