No Time To Blink by Dina Silver

Author:Dina Silver [Silver, Dina]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781503954120
Publisher: Lake Union Publishing
Published: 2018-02-12T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eighteen

CATHERINE

Beirut, 1971

By the time Ann Marie was six months old, my desperation hit a new low. After Gabriel first took my passport, I lost it. My hands and limbs were trembling so much that I had to lie on the kitchen floor so I wouldn’t pass out and hurt myself by tumbling onto the table and chairs. He’d come home that day like a flash of light and turned our relationship from partners and lovers to captor and hostage. As soon as I was able to stand and see straight, I rang Brigitte again. She had just left my apartment, leaving a trail of sage advice that was intended to bring me peace. No such luck.

“I can’t understand you,” she said. “Give me ten minutes.”

She came back over and found me cradling my child, tears streaming down my face, lip quivering. “He locked up my passport!”

She covered her mouth.

“He wouldn’t even speak to me. Came home seconds after you were gone. He left work to come here and put my passport in the safe.”

“Do you know the combination?”

“No! Of course not.”

Ann Marie began to wail.

Brigitte took the baby from me and bounced with her in her arms. “Did you yell at him?”

I shook my head and buried it in my hands. “I’ve done nothing but ask to see my family.”

“Did you ask him again today when he came home?”

“No. He wouldn’t even talk to me. I tried. All he said was that I was never going to leave this country.” I looked up, furious now. “If he thinks for one second that he can lock me up and keep us from my family, he has another thing coming.”

Brigitte bounced some more and cooed at Ann Marie, who was fussing. “May I fetch her a bottle?”

I nodded. “Thank you.”

“Go on the terrace and try to find your breath. I will meet you out there.”

I found my breath in a pack of cigarettes and a glass of vodka as my neighbor fed my child and placed her back into bed.

Brigitte took a seat next to me. “Let me help you.”

“Escape?”

“No.” She leaned forward. “The more you talk of going home, the less he is willing to allow it, yes?”

“Why do I need his permission to see my family?”

Her face hardened. “Your stubbornness has gotten you this far. I am trying to tell you that you are married to a proud Middle Eastern man.” She clapped her hands in front of my face as if to wake me up. “And until you understand what that means for you and the baby, then his threats will be your reality.”

“You keep asking me what I did wrong today, and I did nothing.”

“I keep asking you so I can understand where we go from here. If you did not argue with him today, then let him come home from work this evening and pretend you are not upset with what he’s done.”

I laughed out loud. “So, he should get away with confiscating my passport?”

Brigitte sat back in her seat and crossed her legs.

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