Nice Is Just a Place in France by Betches

Author:Betches
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Gallery Books
Published: 2013-03-12T00:00:00+00:00

Prague: You like to have fun and you don’t mind if you do so in a place that’s culturally still behind the Iron Curtain. You don’t mind being assaulted by hairy men because the clubs are really fun. It’s a little too bro-y (too much beer and prostitution for our taste) but whatevs, it’s still like really pretty. Also, it’s cheap as fuck. We’re pretty sure you can buy a Czech baby for five hundred koruna.

Amsterdam: Okay, we get that Anne Frank studied abroad here, but nowadays, unless you want to spend your semester abroad in a comatose state, keep it to a weekend visit, okay? The only people who spend a semester here probably have a black light and a poster of Bob Marley hanging above their bed.

Copenhagen: You enjoy the igloo life or are trying to take real classes. Neither is okay.

Edinburgh: Pretty but also too fucking cold. How do those bros walk around in skirts all the time?!

Australia: You’ve been all over Europe a bunch of times and want to cultivate your outdoorsy side by doing things like skydiving, posing next to baby tigers, and wearing flippers. You also harbor a deep appreciation for semester-long tans and blond rugby players with hot accents.

Tel Aviv: You’re Jewish and you love that about yourself. You will come home with a nameplate necklace of your Hebrew name (or what you think is your Hebrew name) and will forever pretend to completely understand Middle Eastern politics.

Buenos Aires: You want the Europeanness of Europe and the heat of Australia. If you’re staying in the Americas, it’s the most normal place to go. We hear the clubs are fun, and BA is no doubt the spot to hear the latest remixes of “Don’t Cry For Me, Argentina.”

Capetown/China/Egypt/India, etc.: We doubt the type of hemp-wearing, open-minded vegan who would go to these places has been able to make it this far into the book, we’ll leave it at that.

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