Meant for More by Liza James

Author:Liza James [James, Liza]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-03-25T18:30:00+00:00

I didn't have sex with her.

Liv, I mean.

Well, I didn't have sex with Bloom either. I know I made it sound like I may have hooked up with our best friend while she was with Benj. I was fucking angry, and annoyed.

And jealous.

I've never been jealous or possessive over Bloom before. I wish I knew the exact moment everything changed, the instant our landslide was set into motion.

Have I always been attracted to her? Have I always felt this way about her?

Part of me thinks I have. But Bloom is so independent. She's entirely her own person, consumed by her art and her family and her studies. It's never been a question as to whether I'd lose her to someone else because I never saw her take a serious interest in anyone.

Until Benj.

That's when it became real—the thought of losing her. That's when I realized she's meant more to me than I fully grasped over these years.

And now that I've had her in the ways I have?

Now that I've tasted her—she's mine.

I was with Liv last night because I was ending things with her. I put a stop to the forward progression of our relationship. I didn't tell her I had feelings for Bloom though. I didn't think it was the right time to reveal that. So, I told her I needed to focus on football and the upcoming draft at the end of the year.

I stayed with her because I wanted to know when Bloom got back, and maybe that's fucked up of me but I couldn't help it. I was pissed at the game for what she said, but only because she has to know I would never view her or her family as any kind of baggage to my career.

Now, I'm sitting in our Color Theory class. At the back of the auditorium where Bloom and I usually sit together. My hoodie is pulled up over my head and I'm trying my hardest to stay awake in this fucking class.

I'm exhausted. I left shortly after Bloom finished, when she became quiet and unsure like she always does when it comes to us. I know she feels guilty over Liv, and I don't know how to fix it just yet. A part of me doesn’t want to tell her I didn’t sleep with Liv because I’m unsure if she slept with Benj.

I'm an asshole. I know.

But something scrapes against my skin and eats at my insides when I think about her giving her virginity to Benj. She couldn't have, and if she did, he would have never made her feel the way I have.

Our professor steps in front of the class and begins going over today's topics—Color Psychology. I glance behind me and toward the door, then my left, realizing Bloom hasn't arrived and is officially late.

She's never late.

I slide back in my seat and pull out my phone, quickly tapping out a text and shooting it off to her.

Carter: Where you at, Baby Bloom?

BB: Library. Liv needed me today.

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