Into the Mystic - A Bubba the Monster Hunter Novella by John G. Hartness
Author:John G. Hartness [Hartness, John G.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Falstaff Books
Published: 2017-03-22T22:00:00+00:00
9
Everybody pretty much wanted to try the closer option first, and I didnât blame them. It made the most sense, trying to get through to Faerie by the nearest route would be faster, and we didnât exactly have a surplus of time to work with.
We all went out to gear up while Mama got a map and some rough directions from Roy. I still didnât like the dude, but he seemed pretty trustworthy. At least as long as we did what we said weâd do and got the hell off his property soon.
âWhat did this guy do to get thrown out of the Church, anyway?â Skeeter asked as he opened the back hatch on the Groover and started putting on body armor. Skeeter ainât much good in a fight, but heâs made a lot of money selling collectibles on eBay and doing freelance IT work, so he can afford the best gear money can buy. He thinks it makes him look tougher, and I never have had the heart to tell him it makes it look like heâs armor-plating a toothpick. Sure, heâs a bigger badass than he used to be, but he still ainât putting any fear into the hearts of men. Or women. Or housecoats. Or schnauzers.
âItâs a long story,â Joe replied, strapping down a Colt 1911 pistol in a holster on his leg. Joe carried a Buck hunting knife and a Winchester 700 rifle with a scope and bipod, too. He wasnât the best of us close in, but the preacher could shoot Washingtonâs eye out of a quarter from a hundred yards.
âWe got time,â I said. I had Bertha in a shoulder rig, a couple extra magazines under my right arm, and my caestus on my hands. The metal-clad spiked gloves made me feel even more badass than they looked. I didnât go in much for long guns. Bertha was usually all the firearm I needed. I slung Grandpappyâs sword over my head in a scabbard that left the handle sticking up over my left shoulder and practiced drawing it a couple of times. Iâd gotten better with the sword as time went by, but I was always going to be more of a punch and shoot things kinda guy.
âRoy was excommunicated for falling in love with his work,â Joe said.
A lightbulb went off for me, and from the way Amyâs head snapped up, it did for her, too. She paused in checking her weapon, a H&K MP-5 submachine gun, and asked, âSo that woman in there, sheâs the reason Roy was fired from the church?â
âIf I get fired for a woman, I hope sheâs at least that pretty,â I muttered.
âShe is,â Amy said. I blushed and nodded at her, and she gave me a grin that let me know she was almost joking.
âYeah, Roy and his Hunter ran across her out west somewhere, and she glamoured the crap out of the Hunter. I donât know if she was going to kill him or what, but apparently when Roy got there, the Hunter was tied to a spit over a huge fire.
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Dark Humor | Humorous |
Satire |
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