How to Be a Power Connector by Judy Robinett

Author:Judy Robinett
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: McGraw-Hill Education
Published: 2014-07-21T16:00:00+00:00

Step 2: Meet and Immediately Connect

If you want to form meaningful bonds that lead to productive collaboration and innovation, make room for more close encounters.

—KEITH FERRAZZI

Whether it is a face-to-face meeting, over the phone, or online, you have only a short window of time either to create a strong connection or to become another forgotten face in the crowd. If you wish to create a lasting impression no matter how brief the encounter, follow these guidelines drawn from observing master connectors in every industry. (Many of these refer to in-person meetings, but they can easily be applied to phone or online contacts.) Some of these suggestions may seem intuitive, but you must ask yourself how many you actually implement every time you meet someone new.

Your personal style speaks long before you open your mouth. Make what you say and how you look suitable. Most people can recognize quality clothing and jewelry, and they will notice yours. Dress appropriately for the situation, meeting place, and goal of the meeting. If you’re clueless about style, a good department store, women’s boutique, or men’s store will often have people who can help you choose outfits. Buy the best quality you can afford. (And notice other people’s clothing. I have found that complimenting women and men on a jacket, a tie, or a piece of jewelry is an excellent way to open a conversation, and vice versa—wearing something unique yourself can be an ice-breaker for others.) On the phone or in an online contact, make sure your speaking and writing styles are professional and appropriate. Watch your grammar and spelling, please—mistakes make you look sloppy and uneducated.

Look approachable. We’ve all seen people walking down a hall or in the corner of a room, their postures and facial expressions making it very clear they’re not open to conversation. Nowadays, it’s much more likely to see people with their heads down and their attention fixed on smartphone screens. (According to one study, most smartphone users check their phones every six and a half minutes.6) If you want to connect, take your eyes off of your phone and get interested in the people around you.

Say hello. Statistics show only 2 percent of our conversations are with strangers.7 That means that many of us pass like ships in the night, not realizing what we have missed by not offering a kind word or a smile to a stranger. The transition from stranger to acquaintance can take less than five seconds if you’re willing to be the first to break the ice. You may have heard about the Marriott “15/5 rule”: whenever an employee comes within 15 feet of anyone in a Marriott hotel, the employee acknowledges the guest with eye contact or a friendly nod. If the guest comes within 5 feet, the employee smiles and says hello. Take on the Marriott rule for yourself, and be the first to reach out.

The first three minutes of a connection are vital for building rapport. You have only a brief time to make a strong first impression, so maximize those first three minutes.

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