Hammered by Pippa Grant & Lili Valente

Author:Pippa Grant & Lili Valente [Grant, Pippa & Valente, Lili]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Fifteen

Olivia

* * *

“I wish you were a real detective, Sir Pendleton.” I pace back and forth in front of Hope’s whiteboard in her office, carefully examining our list of clues.

Sir Pendleton—who I brought to stay with Hope until I can get Princess’s humping under control—shoots me a look from the desk that infers that he is a real detective and I’m simply not listening hard enough.

“Then talk louder,” I mutter. “We’re running out of time. The wedding’s in two hours.”

“Talking to the squirrel again?” Hope asks, breezing in with two cups of turmeric and ginger tea, in hopes the herbs will help clear our heads now that our girls’ lunch has turned into a clue gathering session. I told her everything, which is good, because I skipped work today and I’ve been all over town on my own looking for clues and it turns out I’m not a very good detective.

“Yes. But so far he’s refusing to give up the goods.” I sneeze, then glare at Sir P. “But he knows something, I can tell. He was there the night it happened.”

“The night you fell in love with Jace?” she says, using the L word again.

“The night Jace and I discovered that our auras are naturally complementary. It’s not time for the L word, yet,” I say, even though it’s becoming increasingly clear that what I feel for Jace is so much more than lust.

I don’t stay up all night and show up on a new friend’s front stoop with a stuffed Inspector at Large and a list of clues for just anyone.

“All right, adding that in.” She writes “discovery of Sir Pendleton” next to “discovery and subsequent adoption of Princess von Spooksalot” on the “Things that Could be Relevant” list.

“In the trash,” I add. “We found him in the trash.”

She scrawls. “Where? Who would throw out such a magnificent specimen?”

“I don’t know, but he was in the bins behind the bar. Jace said it was kind of a catch-all place for people to dump unwanted things they’re too embarrassed to throw out anywhere else.”

“Interesting,” she says, lips puckering as she studies the board. “I’ll know where to go the next time I need to throw out an old dildo.”

I giggle. “Me too. Though I do try to recycle them whenever possible. They make great coat hangers and stands for drying rainboots upside down.” I frown. “But if Ginger and Jace get married, I won’t be welcome at the Wild Hog anymore. Not even in the back by the trash cans. I swear, I thought she was going to skin me alive last night.” I glance down at my elbow, where I’m sporting a set of bruises in the shape of Ginger’s fingers and thumb.

“Not going to happen. Let’s go over the timeline again,” Hope says, taking a sip of tea. “So allegedly, Ginger’s friend sees you making out with Jace in the park. She tattles to Ginger, who, miraculously, finds out she’s pregnant a few days later and Jace

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