Find Big Fat Fanny Fast by Joe Bruno

Author:Joe Bruno [Bruno, Joe]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Humour, cookie429, Kat, Extratorrents
ISBN: 9781456305895
Google: ihZOYgEACAAJ
Barnesnoble:
Goodreads: 8541852
Publisher: CreateSpace
Published: 2010-10-21T23:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 14

Crappy

Charlie “Crappy” Crappola sat alone at his favorite table at Forlini's Restaurant, on Baxter Street, fifty feet south of Canal Street. Forlini's is right around the corner from New York City criminal courts buildings and down the block from the city prison, called “The Tombs.”

In the last generation, there had been a mass exodus of neighborhood Italians to places like Brooklyn, Queens, Long Island, Staten Island, and unfortunately Rikers Island and other prisons located in the continental United States. Not to mention various graves, some in cemeteries and some in places unknown; beneath the ground, in various rivers and streams, or compacted in cars. Such is life.

Forlini's clientele now consisted almost entirely of people associated with the criminal courts buildings in the immediate neighborhood. Ninety percent of Forlini's customers are judges, lawyers, district attorneys, court officers, court workers and what Crappy called rat-bastard cops. Wiseguys and their associates avoided Forlini's like the plague, not wanting to be under the same roof with those whose life's mission was to put them permanently in prison.

Crappy's table was next to the cash register, to the immediate left of the restaurant entrance. From this vantage point he could see everyone as they entered, before they could see him. Which just might one day save Crappy's life.

Baxter Street is one block west of Mulberry, where all the wiseguys hang out to discuss whose legs deserved to be broken and whom they should soon make disappear off the face of the earth. Be that as it may, Forlini's was the perfect place for Crappy to meet someone in “the life” without the treacherous scumbags around the corner knowing anything about it.

As for the menu, Forlini's was famous for its fine Chicken Gropallo — chicken with artichoke hearts, sun-dried tomatoes, black olives, mushrooms, and white wine sauce, served on top of fettuccine; the people's favorite Scarparelli, for one or for two — diced chicken, sausage, filet mignon, bell peppers, mushrooms, scallions, garlic and white wine sauce. And the immortal Involtini di Gamberi — rolled shrimp, stuffed with prosciutto, cheese and mushrooms and white wine sauce.

Crappy, who weighed somewhere in the neighborhood of four hundred pounds, had just ordered all three of Forlini's specialty dishes as his main course, after first knocking down two Hot Antipasto platters of clams, shrimps, stuffed mushrooms, sautéed eggplant and artichoke hearts arreganata.

Of course, all three main courses came with either a side of spaghetti, or a side of escarole. Crappy, daintily watching his weight, had opted for only two side orders of spaghetti and one side of escarole, not to be a pig.

The busboy removed the finished hot antipasto plates, as the waiter refilled Crappy's wine class with red vino from a large carafe of the house red, which was just fine indeed for Crappy and a hell of a lot cheaper than the wines Forlini's served in bottles.

Minutes later, just as the waiter was placing the three main courses on the table, Crappy noticed Skinny Benny slide though the front door of the restaurant.

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