Ella Rosa and the Song of the Seirenes by S V Reimers

Author:S V Reimers [Reimers, S V]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: IndiePulp Books
Published: 2020-03-10T22:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eight

Finding Philoman!

Rich people are not like the rest of us. At some point in your bleak, impoverished existence, you may have heard the old adage that rich people “put their pants on one leg at a time, just like you and I.” Whoever told you that was a maker damned liar. Philoman Patronis, the wealthiest man in the Universe, employs three strong men to drop him into his trousers two legs at a time. And one those pants are on? He goes to work, and earns three billion CREDITS per second.

How does he do it, you ask? With intense focus, razor-sharp wit, impressive intelligence, bottomless strength and vitality, and seemingly endless barrels of CREDITS. So many CREDITS. Enough to buy all the focus, wit, intelligence, strength and vitality he needs to succeed. Does the Founder earn a doctorate in quantum mechanics when he wants to improve faster-than-light communications throughout the Universe? No! He hires a nerd with crippling student loans at 20% above poverty to build it for him. Does Philoman Patronis spend his time in the gym, keeping his body and mind physically fit? Heck no! For the low cost of a gym membership and steroid injections, he outsources his muscles to gym rats and meatheads, and has them surgically reattached when they’re big and strong and ready to kick corporate ass. He’ll even outsource death itself, for the low, low cost of your telomeres.

As I said before, rich people are nothing like you and I..

Nothing separates your sad existence from the rich more than your hobbies. While you might spend your Saturdays binge-watching television with a bag of microwave popcorn and eyes full of tears, Philoman Patronis enjoys sailing to his private island, where he hunts Waerdians for sport. Rumor has it, nothing excites our Founder more than following a trail of patchouli oil to a nature-worshipping wastoid or layabout, and field-testing his latest raygun technology.

Now THAT’S living!

- Excerpt from “The Known Universe: A Quick Reference for Newbies” by University Liberalis Publishing

§

Ella felt a sudden gust of wind as she cleared the top of the dome, stepping onto the observation platform behind Noowt and the Seirenes. Although the dome was an impressive structure, it was still less tall than the surrounding skyscrapers, and completely dwarfed by Patronis Tower.

Noowt was talking with the Seirenes when Ella arrived, a little out of breath from the climb. “You said you can fly us to the top of Patronis Tower from here?” Noowt spoke to Sinoe, “How?”

Sinoe quietly unwrapped her shimmering garment, pulling it away from her back and over her breasts and abdomen. As her back was uncovered, hidden wings unfurled, lifting away from the space under her shoulder blades. They were large and nearly translucent, shaped like the wings of a bird, though covered in a white velutinous fur. The edges of the wings glimmered in the afternoon sunlight, and there was an audible sound as they caught the breeze.

“Wow”, Ella said, mouth agape, looking at the Seirene, “I didn’t know…”

“They are well hidden”, Sinoe said.

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