Dreamseller by Brandon Novak

Author:Brandon Novak [Novak, Brandon]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Kensington Publishing Corp
Published: 2009-09-24T05:00:00+00:00

chapter eighteen

From the Beginning

I am in Mr. Leeper’s office, cradled in the softness of the armchair that was designed to comfort and relax those who sit in it. Why am I nervous?

Mr. Leeper is well dressed: a thin-striped tie, freshly ironed light blue shirt, brand-new navy-blue slacks, and a white pair of shoes, which appear to be worn for the first time. He even smells great. Recovered addicts take pride in their appearance, a symbol of an improved state of being.

“How you holding up, Mr. Novak?” Mr. Leeper asks.

“Okay I guess, given the circumstances.”

“It could always be worse,” Mr. Leeper replies.

“That’s what Dane told me,” I say to myself.

“I believe we got off to a great start yesterday. You exhibited several signs of your willingness to change. You know, Brandon, I have a lot of clients, some are willing, some aren’t. It is my job to treat each one in the same way. It’s up to you to accept or deny the advice and guidance I’m offering. Now, before we really start to get to the root of your problem,” Mr. Leeper says, “ask yourself: Are you ready?”

“Yes,” I reply.

“So, Mr. Novak, I’ve read over your files. I know a bit about your past, your family life, and how it wasn’t the best. Unfortunately, paperwork is only face value so we’re gonna have to go over all that stuff.”

He continues with this bombshell: “After we talked yesterday, I called and spoke with your mother.”

A moment ago I felt excitement about this session. Now I’m angry, no longer receptive to his help. I don’t believe he had any right to call my mother without consulting me first. How could he tell me he is trying to build a trusting relationship, only to betray me?

“Don’t you want to know how it went?” asks Mr. Leeper.

I shake my head with a look of disgust on my face.

“Mr. Novak, we’re going to do this thing now, and truthfully, if you really want to go get better, there’s no need to sugarcoat anything.”

All my past decisions have left me in prisons or abandoned houses. So, at this point, I am pretty fucking vulnerable, and looking for guidance. Although Mr. Leeper is not perfect, he has achieved what seems to be impossible: quitting drugs, and right now he’s the only person in my life willing and able to guide me in that direction. So, I decide to give him my trust. You might call it a “leap of faith.”

“Okay, how’d it go?” I whisper.

“Well, Mr. Novak, I can tell you she’s ecstatic, but at the same time terrified.”

I open up. “I knew that before you said it. This is exactly why I didn’t even want to tell her I’m here. I’m infamous for building up her hopes and dreams only to shoot them down at the first chance I get to act on free will. Do you know how many times I’ve done that to her? Do you know how many times I’ve made her cry?”

“Well,

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