Cosmic Health by Jennifer Racioppi

Author:Jennifer Racioppi [Racioppi, Jennifer]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Little, Brown and Company
Published: 2021-01-12T00:00:00+00:00

Turning Fear and Resistance into Treasure

Looking back, I can see that my career transition, while major, was also sort of simple—once I’d shifted my mindset and wholeheartedly pursued my desires. Some big changes are like that, and some are not. About ten years later, I found myself at a crossroads that didn’t feel so easy.

It began one day as I sat before my gynecologist and she uttered “osteoporosis.” Hearing that word, I froze in shock and horror.

Osteoporosis, a disease common among older women, occurs when bones become so brittle, they can fracture from simple movement, like bending forward. While I knew that osteoporosis was a risk after my hysterectomy, I’d gone to great lengths over the years to prevent the disease—changing my diet, supplementing with bioequivalent estrogen and vitamins, working out, practicing yoga, and seeing specialty doctors. But none of that could make up for not having actual ovaries.

Although I was only in my thirties, my bones were growing increasingly brittle. That diagnosis was a huge blow to my confidence, and it propelled me into an existential crisis. For months I battled massive waves of fear, anxiety, grief, and anger that felt like an emotional flood I couldn’t escape. Knowing that my health would require a tremendous amount of my energy and attention from that point forward, I agonized over whether or not to pursue adoption. It was a grueling choice.

Unlike with my business, this time I wouldn’t get what I wanted—not even close. It’s a reality that many people with chronic illnesses face. Taking on parenting didn’t feel like the right choice for my body. It was a very tough decision but ultimately the one I needed to make.

Yet even without a chronic disease, life eventually serves up circumstances that are beyond our control. When that happens, we have a critical choice to make around the kind of story we tell ourselves and the mindset we adopt.

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