Closet Case (Robert Rodi Essentials) by Rodi Robert

Author:Rodi, Robert [Rodi, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: FICTION / Urban Life, FIC052000, FIC000000, FICTION / Gay, FIC011000, FICTION / General, FIC048000, FICTION / Satire
Published: 2012-03-21T07:00:00+00:00

18

Lionel remembered nothing of the drive home. His mind was fogged by mortification. Sights, sounds, smells, all dissipated as soon as he experienced them. He likewise remembered nothing of parking, or of getting out of the car, or of letting himself into his building and climbing the stairs. And then Emil’s face appeared before him, and it took a solid eight seconds to realize that this really was Emil in the flesh and not some manifestation of his shame.

“Emil,” he said, the mists parting. “Hi.”

Emil had his hand on the railing and each of his feet on a different step. Apparently he had been coming down the stairs while Lionel was coming up. Now they stood facing each other, having taken each other by surprise.

“Home at last,” Emil said. “I’ve been waiting for an hour! I only just now gave up. What a coincidence!” He laughed nervously.

Lionel’s head had cleared enough for him to begin speculating on why Emil was here. A change of heart? An attack of romantic love? A homosexual epiphany? His heart revved up; then skittered to a halt. Not tonight, for God’s sake, he thought, Tracy’s scorn still ringing in his ears.

Emil nodded at his tuxedo and said, with endearing obviousness, “You’ve been out.”

Lionel shifted his weight. “The awards ceremony. I told you about it.”

“Oh, yes. That’s right.” An uncomfortable pause settled over them. Emil grinned, and Lionel attempted a smile. The only sounds were the creaks and moans of the building settling.

Emil finally broke down and said, “I came to apologize. I’m afraid I upset you yesterday. I tried phoning. I thought you were avoiding my calls, so I came over.”

“No, no,” Lionel insisted, shifting his weight again. “I wasn’t upset.”

Emil took a step closer. “I did; you mustn’t deny it, Lionel. But you mustn’t think I meant to hurt you, either. I wasn’t angry, although I must have seemed so. It was just that you made me recall Mircea, and — those memories — they’re very painful to me.”

He backed away. “I understand. I never thought — “

“You’ve been such a good friend,” Emil continued. “I am not well-liked by my countrymen here, you know, first because I’m an anarchist and not afraid to say so, but also, even more damningly, because I’m studying to be a doctor, and most of them are laborers of some sort. They don’t trust that I am one of them. I find myself always having to prove myself to them. I must always weigh my words, take care not to say anything that will provoke their jealousy. Aside from my uncle and aunt, you are the only one to whom I can speak freely.”

Lionel shook his head. “I’m flattered. Look, you don’t have to worry; I know you weren’t angry — not with me, anyway. There’s no need to apologize or explain.”

Emil grabbed Lionel and drew him into a smothering, musk-smelling embrace. Lionel felt his penis come blaring to life. Where were you earlier? he wanted to scream.

He’d

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