Clearing the Aisle by Karen Schwartz

Author:Karen Schwartz
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: S and S
Published: 2004-07-15T00:00:00+00:00

Sixteen

The call I’d been expecting came later that week. I was just returning from a postwriting swim and, knowing Dan was up at school, scrambled to pick up the phone before the machine did.

“Hello?” I said, beating it.

“Do you know what your father is doing ?” my mother yelled.

“What?” I asked, bracing myself. Why hadn’t I just let the machine answer?

“I just went to the mailbox and found a typed letter from your father saying that I have until February twenty-eighth to give him the money for my thirty-five guests, the additional charge for kosher food, and an agreement in writing to provide the cake. This is outrageous! I have never, ever heard of anyone doing anything like this! Did you know about this?”

I took a deep breath and thought about endorphins. “Yeah.”

“And you think this is right —”

“I don’t know if I think it’s right —”

“You don’t know! You don’t—this is insulting! This is incredible! I’ve never in my life heard of anyone being treated this way—”

“I know it’s bullshit, Mom. But, if you just do what he wants—”

“If I what? ”

“If you just go along with his deadline, everything will be resolved and we can all just focus on the happy event taking place.”

“Oh, yeah, sure! Go ahead! Have your party on my back! I should have known you’d take his side. You always do. Your wonderful father! You don’t give a shit about me and you never have—”

“Mom, that’s not true—”

“Oh, that’s not true? That’s not true? What kind of daughter allows her mother to be treated this way—”

“Mom, I agree with you. It’s ridiculous. But just—please. There are a million and one things that have to get done for this wedding. Can’t we just get some of them resolved?”

“You think this is my fault?”

“It’s not about fault, Mom. It’s not about fault. It’s just about having things squared away once and for all—”

“That’s right. Drag your mother through the gutter so you can get everything all neat and clean for your precious wedding—”

“Come on, Mom. No one’s dragging you through a gutter. Just forget about his deadline and his bullshit way of going about it for a second. All of this is stuff you’d have to do eventually anyway, right?”

“A written agreement to provide the cake? ”

“Okay, not that. That, I agree, is absurd. But the rest—”

“I have never —”

“Mom—”

“ Ever —”

“Mom! I’m saying I agree with you. I think it’s crazy. But if you just do the stupid things he’s asked for—”

“And what about what happens if I don’t make his cocka-mamie deadline? If I don’t do what he wants when he wants it, he’ll cut my guest list!”

“What?” He never said anything to me about cutting the guest list. I felt the first signs of losing my cool. I realized I was still in my coat and began struggling out of it.

“If I don’t meet his deadline, he is going to start cutting my guest list. The first week, it goes down to thirty guests.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.