Andy Roddick Beat Me with a Frying Pan by Todd Gallagher

Author:Todd Gallagher [Gallagher, Todd]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-49394-1
Publisher: Crown Publishing Group
Published: 2007-09-07T16:00:00+00:00

* Crawford was the one guy everyone could name—everyone except for Lopez, that is. Pitcher Scott Kazmir came in a distant second in terms of mentions.

Question 18

HOW GOOD ARE PRO GOLFERS AT MINIATURE GOLF?

We’ve all played miniature golf and had a blast. Through the windmill, into the trapdoor, over the drawbridge, we whacked our brightly colored ball with our junky plastic putter and hoped for the best.

But how would a PGA pro do under these circumstances? Yes, they putt for millions of dollars, but would men who need absolute quiet to hit a shot be able to deal with putting through a waterfall? To find out, I went to Statler’s miniature golf course in Greensburg, Pennsylvania, and played the town’s finest: PGA Tour veteran Rocco Mediate.

One of the best iron players in all of golf, Rocco has had a career that puts him in fast company: he is forty-seventh on the all-time earnings list with more than $12 million in winnings, has five career tournament wins, and has been ranked in the top twenty in the world. Maybe more important for our purposes, Rocco is a pro’s pro. He’s the kind of guy you could stick on any course, anywhere in the world, and he’d put up a good number. He fits the mental profile of someone who can handle putting a red ball up a fake anthill without the help of a caddy, a plumb bob, and a sports psychologist. Said Tiger Woods about the easygoing Mediate: “Rocco is very loose. No matter whether he’s shooting eighty or sixty, he’s still the same.”

Before our match, though, Rocco was pessimistic about his chances. “I’m not a good Putt-Putter,” he said. It’s true that as far as PGA Tour pros go, Rocco is not the greatest of putters, and back problems have led him to switch between a long and conventional stick, which has further hindered him on the greens. That being said, Rocco is still a better putter than almost anyone on the planet.

We started and as it turned out, Rocco’s evaluation of his Putt-Putt game was pretty much on the money. His ball was caroming every which way over the first eight holes, with a variety of poor approaches and missed 5-footers. “I’m a bogey golfer,” Rocco said with a hint of disgust. “I’m a bogey Putt-Putt golfer.” I, on the other hand, was shooting a sizzling even par and jumped out to a 5-stroke lead. “I’m a beastly golfer,” I said. “I’m a beastly Putt-Putt golfer.”

It was only going from bad to worse for Roc Live when on a particularly brutal hole he had to fish his ball out of the water. Making a double bogey 4, he could only laugh: “This is ridiculous!”

As Tiger indicated, it can be tough to read the laid-back Mediate, but I got the sense on the front 9 that Rocco wasn’t exactly treating our no-stakes grudge match like it was a playoff at the U.S. Open. When he came storming back, I

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